HOPE IN MY POCKET

The Birth of Haven Joy

2012-02-07T18:44:00.000-06:00

Where did I leave off.. we all 'camped out.' Every 4 hours, ournurse would come in to take my vitals (blood pressure, temp) and todose me up on antibiotics. Occasionally when the antibiotics weren'tmixed well with the saline, it would burn my arm, but other than that Ihad no problems during or after the treatment.

About7:30, another midwife - shift change - Allison, came by to check on meand tell me that we were approaching the 24 hour mark. Since mycontractions had not started on their own, we needed to start pitocin. They completely stopped when I went to sleep. Let me write a littleside note here and say how thankful I am that I went with midwives forthis delivery. They let me just wait to see if anything happened for24 hours from when my water broke! This is not the OB norm. UsuallyOB's want to see your baby already delivered within that 24 hours. Since I had started on the antibiotics and Haven was doing great on themonitor, they advocated for me to wait and to sleep & restbefore pitocin. I am so thankful for this!

At 8 am mypitocin drip was started at 2ml - the lowest dose. Every 30-45minutes, it was turned up 2 ml. From 8-9am my contractions regulated,but were not painful. They were tight - like I had a big bloodpressure cuff around my belly. They would last about 30 - 45 secondsand were about 3-4 minutes a part. We called my doula, Heidi, around10. It would take her about an hour or so to get to the hospital.

At11am I was sitting in the rocking chair listening to my iPod when Ifelt a small pop and the all I could say was OH MY! OH MY! My waterbroke FOR REAL this time, and all I can say is let the river flow! Ido not know what in the world I would have done if I was out in publicand this happened. Chris and Nancy jumped to attention when I startedsaying Oh My! And they both stood frozen just watching. I startedlaughing so hard that I couldn't talk. Chris was saying 'what do Ido?!' I finally told him to call the nurse. He called them, stillstunned at the amount of fluid, and just sputtered out ' My wife isleaking!!!' Nancy and I died laughing again.

Wow,contractions drastically changed at this point. I could really feelHaven moving down, and the intensity of the pitocin turned up ever 30minutes was definitely working. Here are some bullet points of thingsI remember in the 4 hours I labored with out pain relief:

Heidi arriving and rearranging furniture in our room to make it seemmore spacious. I thought it was weird at first, but then it did openup the room and make it not seem so chaotic.

Changing positions. Sitting in the rocking chair, in the bed while onmy knees leaning over the birthing ball, leaning over the bed whilestanding, rocking my hips, holding on to Chris.

Chris was my rock, my calmer. His hands felt very strong and I feltvery safe when he was in the room. I just wanted him near me. I wantedto hear his voice. I really liked when he would put his hand on myforehead. I felt stronger.

The pain was so intense. My contractions were reallycoming on top of each other. This was at the point I was deemed in'active' labor. I was done, though. The pain was searing across mybelly. I got checked and was only at 2 cm. I just couldn'tkeep focus and said the glorious words... I want an epidural!!! I hada lot of unknowns looming ahead of me... one being a very big baby andtwoa possibility of something going wrong with my c-section scar. Gettingan epidural seemed to help me mentally deal with those two unexpectedpossibilities - as well as the pain. After all, my goal wasnot so much 'no meds' as much as it was 'VBAC.'

OnceI decided to get the epidural, the pain increased times abagillion. I don't know how long each contraction lasted at thispoint,but they were breaking for about 20 seconds in between. Sitting on theside of the bed curled over the pillow was the hardest thing I haveever done. The contractions were coming like waves, and I could notforthe life of me figure out how to 'ride' them. They were just barrelingme over. I remember moaning very low through each one. I remembersaying Owwwwwwwwww!!!!!!! I remember opening my eyes briefly here andthere. I would see Chris' face, I would see his hand holding mine. Iwould see the nurse's shoes. I would see the crazy hat theanesthesiologist waswearing. I remember her telling me that she knew I was in pain, butthat my hair looked amazing - LOL (although I didn't LOL then!) They walked me through what they were doing to my back, but I seriouslydidn't care about my back, all I could concentrate on were thosecontractions. I really felt like I was in some sort of trance. Lifewas all around me, but I was somewhere else. Being sucked into thebirth. It felt like it took areallllly loooong time for them to place the epidural, but it probablywas like 10 minutes or so. I'll have to ask Chris. So, I did askChris and he didn't remember. He said it felt like forever to him,too, because he had to watch me labor in pain. Precious.

Whenthe meds started taking place, my legs started with that familiartingly feeling. I did get itchy a little bit this time...on my belly,but it only lasted about 15 minutes. As soon as I was somewhat numb,my midwife did check me and I was 6 cm!! Yahoo!! All that worksitting on the side of the bed was worth it! With Harper I wascompletely numb. Couldn't feel a single contraction, but this timearound I could still feel each contraction. The sharp pain was justtaken away. Haven continued to look amazing on the monitor, and I wasdoing fine too.

I wondered if I would feel regret getting an epidural, and I have tosay that I have ZERO regret! I wanted to try this naturally. And Idid try it. I have no idea how I could have handled more pain. I donot look at women who birth naturally with awe any more... I look atthem and think - you are really missing out on fabulous medicine!! :-)

I had someone put on the birthplaylist on speakers so we could listen to it in the room. I rememberHeidi and Nancy singing

'I will sing praise! I will sing praise! Noweapon formed against me shall remain. I rejoice! And I will declareGod is my victory and He is here. All of my life, in every season, youare still God, I have a reason to sing! I have a reason to worship!'

It was cold and rainy outside, but there was such warmth in our room. Very cozy. The lights were low, and the peace of the Lord was verypresent. I knew He was leading the way. At one point, the song DeepIn Love with You by Michael W. Smith began. While I was laying inbed, I just sang it while I cried. I thought about my journey here. Way back when I thought I might not ever have children. I thoughtabout my Lord and praised Him for my pregnancy and birth with Harper. Ipraised Him for the miraculous pregnancy and birth with our boys. AndI praised Him for this moment. Laboring our sweet daughter into theworld. I was so overcome by His goodness and graciousness, that Icouldn't help but sing to Him.

Sitting at your feet, it's where I want to be

I'm home when I'm here with you.

Ruined by your grace, remembered by your gaze

I can't resist the tenderness of you.

I'm deep in love with you, Abba Father

I'm deep in love with you, O Lord.

My heart it beats for you, Precious Jesus.

I'm deep in love with you, O Lord.

Therewere still several contractions I had to breath through, though. Atsome point, I started shaking. I told everyone I thought I might betransitioning. I felt sort of flu-ish. Heidi wouldrub/ rock my hips back and forth. She had me lay in these weirdpositions to get Haven to move in the correct position. Thankfully,they were really comfortable.

After my shakingended, I fell asleep. I was in this weird zone. I could heareverything going on in the room, but I was asleep. I felt like I wasin a dream. I think I eased in and out of sleep for about an hour anda half. The nurse told me I would feel like I needed to push or my hipswould have a lot of pressure. I was certain I would feel it because Icould feel all the contractions, and I could still feel my toes and feetafter the epidural. I remembered with Harper, I couldn't feel anything but intensepressure in my hips right before I started pushing. Well, with thislittle babe, I felt nothing.

When I woke up, I couldtell I was still having contractions, but I felt like nothing else washappening. I requested to be checked at that point. My midwife, Kate- my favorite!!, came in to check me. She said I was complete andHaven was *right* there. She asked me to do a trial push which sheemphatically stopped because Haven was about to be born! She suitedup real quick. Everything was so relaxed in the room. No stirrups, nochaos. Just lots of excitement!

Here was such a coolpart of the story. My Mom had just wanted to come to the hospital andcheck on me. She had been taking care of the big 4 all day andcommunicating with Chris and Nancy via text! On a 'whim', she had gotten somebabysitters for the boys and Harper (thank you Jean and Christine!!),and hadn't even bothered calling until she arrived at the hospital. So, right after I was checked, my sister got a call from my Mom. Shewas in the waiting room!! We had Nancy get her fast! Ha! My Momwalked in, kissed me on the head, and I started to push. This was at8pm.

Chris was holding my hand. Mom, Nancy, and Heidi were allcheering me on. I pushed through 2 contractions. Right before she wasborn, I felt her feet give me a little fluttery good bye kick at thevery top of my tummy. I will always remember that. And, this is alittle crazy, but I was able to touch her head as she was coming out. So amazing! Haven was born at 8:07pm! Just 7 minutes of pushing!

Shewas put on my tummy right away and let out one squawk. She was brighteyed and very curious. I loved that she was able to stay with me forseveral minutes before they took her to be weighed and checked. They let her umbilical cord stop pulsing before itwas cut. I remember looking at her and saying 'HiSweet girl! Hello Haven!' over and over again. She nursed right awayand has been a champion nurser from the beginning. We joked that shewould be eating table food with in 2 weeks because she came out quitefamished - or so it seemed.

Another story rightafter she was born... we were all sooo curious as to how much sheweighed. Everyone gave their estimates and Nancy guessed 8.8 lbs. Well, when she was finally weighed, they announced her weight ingrams. We all said, okay, that's great, but how many pounds is that?! They called out 8lbs 8 oz! We all cheered because Nancy wasright! Or so we thought. Chris went to the nursery with her while Iwas getting settled in my new room. They weighed and measured herhere, too. Chris looked at her little card in her bassinet and askedwhy it said 9lbs 8 oz! They had announced her weight wrong. My littlepumpkin was 9lbs 8oz and not 8lbs 8 oz! ha!

Chrisbrought her back to the room and found me drinking apple juice andmunching on ice! We were both wiped out! It was about 11pm at thispoint. I ordered a grilled chicken sandwich from 'room service' andlet me just say it was amazing! We got cozy in our room, and settleddown for the night.

The next day was simply wonderful. Harper came by and met herlittle sister. Her excitement could not be contained! She was sowiggly on the bed right before she was able to hold her little sister. She has been the best big sis. After Harper, Mom, and Nancy came by, I had the rest of the day to myself. Chris went home to help with the other sick ones. So, it was just me and Haven. Simply delightful. I had a yummy Vanilla Latte to sip on. We snuggled, listened to Christmas music, wrote thank you notes, and watched a little TV. And, of course, we napped, too. We had a few visitors that morning and a couple that evening, but it was so relaxing being alone in the afternoon. I will always cherish that time we had together.

We came home Saturday. Sadly, the boys were unable to meet Haven forthe first week and a half because they all had a flu-like virus. Theyhave been so gentle with he, though. Crews calls her 'Haby' - (rhymes with baby) He also would point to our bedroom door and say 'baby in dare' when he would hear her cry. :-) Maverick andWarner always come running when they hear her cry. Warner gives her kisses on her head, and Maverick hascome to quiet her down by patting her tummy a time or two.

We are so very blessed to be a family of 7 now.

Haven, you have eased into our family with joy and calm. You are solaid back - even in the evenings. You are a good sleeper - for anewborn - ;-) and a great eater. You are such a sweet girl and we loveyou so much!

Welcoming Haven Joy * Days Leading Up

2012-02-06T18:45:00.000-06:00

I have been working on this post for 7 1/2 weeks! We came home to a house full of sickness, and we have been cycling through that sickness ever since! 'Tis the season. Baby Haven is on her second cold which has turned into RSV since arriving in our family. Guess being #5 requires you to be tough from the get go! (Please pray for our sweet girl and for her big sis. Harper has RSV and pnemonia. Haven has RSV and an ear infection).

As I finish this up, the Super Bowl is ending. Last time the Giants played the Patriots (only 4 short years ago), I was 36 weeks pregnant with Harper. We watched it with some friends...childless. I remember I couldn't breathe and just wanted a baby in my arms! The Giants won! This year, we have 5 sick little kids and watched Baby Einstein for most of the Super Bowl until we put everyone to bed. Except for a sweet baby, who I held in my arms. :-) Oh, and the Giants won again! Chris said to me... Think we should go for 5 more in 4 years?!...We laughed at both agreed that we are complete!

Now without further ado...

Haven Joy's arrival...

Birth week begins on Monday, December 12th. Guess it should start on Sunday as that is when Haven and I marked 39 weeks complete! This tale is filled with lots of detail leading up to Haven's arrival. I wanted to remember it all. Hope your eyes aren't bleeding by the time you are done! ;-)

Monday : December 12

I have to back up this far because I want to remember and record the Lord's faithfulness to me. Y'all know how I hate throwing up? Well, over the weekend, the boys had yucky diapers. Crews even woke up one morning with some throw up in his bed. But his digestive system has always been a little crazy, and since it wasn't a ton, I didn't think much of it. Monday, Harper woke up, ate some cereal, and then started complaining about a tummy ache. She wanted me to sit with her in the bathroom for a while. She was crying because her tummy was cramping, she looked at me and said she needed a trashcan, and then threw up in it. I was super impressed at how calm and collected she was. So brave (and tidy.) And I amazingly didn't freak out. I never believed my Mom when she said I would be fine with throw up when it came to my children. Sure 'nuff...she was right! Harps went on to get sick another time during the day. Between comforting her in her room, to making sure three 2 1/2 year old boys didnt destroy the house, I sprinted up and down the stairs about 20 times that day at 39 weeks pregnant. My adrenaline was pumping, but I remained calm & focused. The Lord just kept reminding me that He goes before me and is behind me. He wouldn't give me anything I couldn't handle.

My Mom drove into town that day to stay with us all the way through January!! She walked through the doors right after Harper had gotten sick the second time. Soooo thankful for her arrival!!

Harper took a long nap and ended up being fine by the evening. I just prayed and prayed that none of us would get it. And none of us did!! Thank you Jesus. I do not need to fear.

Tuesday : December 13

I had my 39 week midwife appointment this morning. I was hopeful and doubtful all the same. I was feeling great, and just thought birth was a long way off. I was very pregnant, but no changes whatsoever. With Harper I remember her 'dropping' way low into my pelvis just the week before I gave birth. Nothing with Haven. My midwife did say that with second and third babies, they don't necessarily 'drop.' So, while it gave me some hope, I was still a little bummed. I was also going back and forth with emotions. I really wanted to have a VBAC, but I was getting very scared about her just staying in and growing bigger and bigger and bigger :-) I even talked with my mom and Chris about scheduling a c-section if it came down to it. We looked at dates and tried to figure out when would be a good time with Christmas approaching. We decided if I was still pregnant at 41 weeks (Christmas Day), I would just call and schedule one. I came to my midwife appointment with all of these feelings.

I met a new midwife at our practice. There are about 7 midwives total. Her name is Addy, and I absolutely loved her! She just sat and talked to me about all my fears and questions. She told me she believed in me, and that while she thought this was a big baby, my body would be able to birth. She told me she would check me and offered to strip my membranes. Well, Haven's head was sooo low, she couldn't get around it to check me, so no stripping was able to happen. I was kind of surprised Haven's head was so low, though, as I couldn't feel it at all. Her 'orders' to me were to make sure I had relaxation time for 30 minutes during the day where I did nothing but focus on relaxing. And, to get a good night's sleep. (Well, okay, if I must!! :-)) She said sometimes that is all it takes for a woman's body to go into labor. My Mom had arrived the day before, so I feel like I was finally able to relax since I knew my children would definitely be taken care of.

That afternoon was wonderful. I had to go get more Red Raspberry Leaf Tea (can help with contractions), and since I adore Whole Foods, I thought I would run in and pick some up there. Whole Foods to me is like a 'spa' grocery store. I love all the fresh fruits and veggies, the unique food items, the quality of food, and the bath & body section. It is relaxing to go to that grocery store! I ended up using that time walking the aisles just looking at stuff & getting some exercise since it was raining that day. I picked up some dinner - roasted chicken, rosemary potatoes, green beans for us. Then, I headed home. Everyone was down for a nap when I returned.

I did my pregnancy stretching DVD, and then laid down on the couch to have some relaxation time. I got a good 45 minute nap in while the house was quiet. I thought about nothing other than preparing my body to birth, and for the first time really felt peace about whatever the outcome would be. I woke up so refreshed.

Mom told me she had the kids so I could finish packing for the hospital and organizing our room. I got all of our bags ready and put them by the door so they would just be in the car whenever I went into labor. I finished my birth poster and completed my birth playlist of worship music. All was ready whenever Haven was ready.

Oh, and this may be silly, but I had a talk with Haven. I told her that she could come out now. That is wasn't scary out here even though it is really loud at times. I told her that I would help her learn to adjust and would be there for her. That she had a big family and lots of love. We were ready to have her join us.

I changed the sheets on our bed, freshened our room, got her cosleeper ready to go. Typical nesting stuff. I had some sweet time with the other 4 ~~babies~~ big kids(who are soooo huge now that we have a tiny baby) . Then, I went to bed early!

Wednesday : December 13

I woke up that morning thinking well, I am still pregnant. I got up and went to the bathroom. I figured I would get dressed before heading downstairs to drink some coffee with Mom. As I was standing at my dresser trying to step into my pants, I prayed 'Lord, I just wonder when it's going to happen.' And just like that Pop! My water broke a bit (will explain the 'a bit' part in a second). I stood there with my eyes wide and mouth wide open! And I think I said outloud, ' Lord! You answered me!' LOL I went to tell Chris and clean up. I also realized I had lost my mucous plug -MP- (two worst words combined, aren't they?!) I called the midwife and said I was a bit confused. I definitely lost more than my MP, but nothing else was coming out. They wanted me to come in to be tested since I was GBS+ (group b strep +...weird condition that comes and goes in everyone without any symptoms, but for birth you need antibiotics).

We finished getting our last minute items together, and got in the car. I really was convincing myself on the way there that we would probably turn around and go home. I hadn't ever lost my MP with other pregnancies, so I as just unsure.

Midwife Melissa tested me with litmus paper and those were negative. She checked me and I was 1 cm. She did another test where they analyze the results under a microscope & look for fern patterns. (fern pattern = amniotic fluid) She said she only saw one tiny fern, but it was a fern & so, she assumed I had a small leak. A word of warning she left us with was that when my water did break, it was going to be a lot! She said if it hadn't broken by the time I was ready to push to make sure I told my midwife to 'suit up.' Yikes! Kind of made me scared to go out in public. Anyway, her orders to us were to go out for some lunch and then head over to the hospital.

We ate lunch at Calypso Cafe. I was excited and was hoping for a fast labor, so I could only eat about half of what was on my plate. Soooo wish I had eaten more!! haha! This was the last food I got for about 36 hours. This is when we sent out texts to let everyone know we were on our way to the hospital. PS.. my water did not break at lunch. Sooo thankful!

We arrived and were put in triage since L&D was very crowded. We had to wait about 3 hours in triage for room. We tried some natural labor inducing techniques while we waited and my contractions did start to pick up. I had one that lasted about 3 1/2 minutes. I was so excited!

My view while in triage.

We made it over to our room, and I was so excited to see we had gotten the one with the birth tub even though I knew I couldn't use it (VBAC & GBS+). Kimberly Williams-Paisley (Brad Paisely's wife/ Father of the Bride star) had this tub installed for her labor. I thought it was neat I got to labor in the same room she did! :-)

My view of the birth tub & giant lamp from the bed.

We got settled and hooked up to monitor me & Haven. I also had my IV started for my antibiotics. I had to be on this every 4 hours for about 20 minutes for each dose. Thankfully, I could detach from wires and monitors every hour for about 40 minutes. Nancy, my sis, arrived around 7:30pm with my Mom (friends were watching the trio & Harps), and we got to power walk the halls a bit. I had 2 big contractions while walking.

Midwife Addy was on call that night, and I was so excited thinking she would be the one to deliver Haven! We talked about our plan of action. My contractions had started to get into a pattern, but then became very irregular. She offered to start pitocin that night, but we decided to sleep and start pitocin around 8 am. It would be 24 hours since my water had broken at that point.

So, Nancy, Chris and I camped out that first night in the hospital. I was offered a sleep aid pill, but was so concerned I might go into labor and be drowsy that I declined. I slept as fine as I could being checked on every few hours. Chris slept on the floor and Nancy slept in the chair bed. I told them I felt like we were camping :-)

Me, Chris & the boppy, and the arm to the chair-bed Nancy slept in.

Next up... Birth Day!!

While You Wait...

2012-01-07T23:05:00.001-06:00

Hi Sweet Friends!

If there is anyone out there who still reads this blog, I am working on our sweet Haven's birth story. She arrived healthy and big on December 15th! I realize she is almost a month old (time, slooowww down!!!) and I still haven't finished it. I will hunker down one of these days and finish writing it up. (Let me just say, I DID have a VBAC! It was awesome!) I am totally in the nostalgic newborn phase...all is sappy and I'm so in love with this little girl and with life. I want to remember every detail from her birth and that is why it is taking me forever to write it! If you haven't seen my sister's post, here is the link to that. My post will be much more wordy and less picturey. But, I do have some extra pics to include that Nancy took of that precious day.

http://nancyrayphotography.com/2012/01/haven-joys-birthday/

Anyway, I had to pop in today and say a hi-dy ho, and to share this other blog post with you. It is seriously my favorite blog post about being a mother that I have ever read. Don't know if its because I'm in that nostaligic newborn phase or what, but as I read it this morning I LOVED everything she had to say!!! Also, I don't want to lose the link. So, here it is. Hope it brings as much encouragement to you as it did to me!!

http://momastery.com/blog/2012/01/04/2011-lesson-2-dont-carpe-diem/

Hope to have our darling girl's birth story finished up in the next week.

Hugs~

Checking In

2011-12-05T14:57:00.001-06:00

Sweet Friends,

Cannot tell you how much you encouraged me with your comments! Thank you so much. I can tell the Lord is gently leading me and transforming me. I want to stay in a humble position before the Lord. I am really going to need His help.

So, we reached the 38 week point yesterday. This is the longest I've ever been pregnant. Weird. I've only had Braxton Hicks contractions still. I feel like I'm just waiting for the big moment & am kind of jumpy thinking my water is going to break.

A little story from this past weekend. So, Friday I had a great nap! I woke up even before all the kids woke up. I walked down the stairs, stepped down 2, and skied down about 4 to the carpeted landing. I fell on my knees and caught myself with my hands. I told my sister I don't know how I didn't topple over. I felt like angels helped steady me. I'm so thankful I didn't hit my belly, but it was a really hard fall. I hurt my left shoulder from catching myself. I called my Mom to ask her if I should call my Midwife. It was after hours at the office, and I just didn't know what to do. I was worried when I didn't regularly feel baby girl...but, it was her 'nap time.' She doesn't move much in the late morning or late afternoon.

Through a couple of phone calls to friends & a mom of a friend who is an RN, I was convinced to call. By this time I had felt Haven move. Sooo thankful. I was sure the midwives wouldn't want to see me, but I called anyway. Well, boy was I wrong! I had to go to the hospital to be observed for 20 hours! Good grief! It was very reassuring to me of how the Lord cares for us. Chris had a 6th grade retreat scheduled for Friday - Saturday, but had lined up everyone & everything in case I were to go into labor. I called him at 6 pm and told him everything that happened so he was able to work on wrapping things up and joining me.

My dear friend, Arica was already on her way to stay with me and the kids that evening, so childcare was done. And my precious friend, JoEllen, picked me up and drove me to the hospital. Chris was able to get there around 9 that night. We hung out, and I was monitored relentlessly (oh how I love the sound of her heartbeat!). The next day, I was finally allowed to eat (hadn't eaten since about 4pm on Friday), and then had an ultrasound to check the placenta. What the midwives were so worried about (especially in late pregnancy) is placental abruption. A fall, a car wreck, a hit to the belly can cause the placenta to tear away from the uterus. Sometimes, it can go unnoticed. Sometime it won't show up for 72 hours. I just passed 72 hours, and all is still well! Yay! They were very very cautious. I'm thankful for that.

Over, the course of the hospital visit, I was able to process a lot of stuff. Things I had been holding up in my heart - fear about the delivery, how big baby is, getting everything done off my to-do list, if anything is happening at all (or if I will be the only women to stay pregnant forever - doesn't every pregnant woman hit that point sometime?!). I had a lot of time to think and pray. I realized that I need not fear anything (why can't I get this?!) The Lord took care of this little weekend, and I know He will care for us when Haven arrives.

I had a good talk with one of my midwives about the size of the baby. She told me Haven was measuring in the 60th percentile at 30 weeks, and it is very unlikely she is going to jump to the 90th percentile in a matter of 8 weeks - especially because I'm not diabetic (thank you Lord!) Ultrasounds (as some of you encouraged me, too) can even be up to 2 lbs off toward the end of pregnancy, so that was comforting, too. And, she also told me, that I was not special (:-)) and I would give birth.

We arrived home Saturday evening and had 2 precious friends come and feed us dinner and bathe the kids. Since Chris and I were woken up on the hour, every hour at the hospital, we were both exhausted. This was such a blessing to us! We love you, Arica and Christine!! I was so thankful to be at home, in my bed, with our sweet little lovies all around us. I woke up Sunday with a new resolve and all fear gone. I have some great plans this week for us - bake cookies, finish decorating the house, Harper's Christmas program, etc. I'm ready to welcome Haven when God says it's time. I pray she comes on her own. And, if she doesn't and she grows to be over 10 lbs, then I am at peace with a c-section. (Can't be induced because of previous C-section)

So, I wait! We will update on her arrival, but appreciate your prayers soooo much - for a healthy mom & baby, for an easy delivery!, for no throwing up (if you've read my blog for a while, you know how much I hate this :-)), for no issues with antibiotics/group b strep (I tested positive this time), for me to contract well after delivery (I had a bit of trouble with this after my c-section with the boys), for other kids to be taken care of, for health of everyone in our family, and anything else the Lord may lay on your heart for us.

I greatly appreciate your sweet comments and love for our family. Wish I could hug each one of you in person! Maybe someday!!

Oh, and Shannon asked if I have a doula - I do have a doula! She has been so helpful and encouraging already. I know she is going to help immensely during labor and delivery!

Love to all!

Lots of Learning & 37 weeks

2011-11-29T21:37:00.001-06:00

Hey!

Well, I am 37 weeks & 2 days today. Went to the midwife & saw my favorite girl - Kate. Let me update on what's going on with me and Haven. All is well - Praise the Lord! Haven is head down - yay, but is measuring a full 2 weeks ahead. So that would be 39 weeks 2 days. No wonder I get comments like - Dang, you must be havin' twins!! and Gosh, your baby is big!! (Had these two lovely comments spoken to me today by strangers). I had a ultrasound last week @ 36.5 weeks & she 'weighed' in at 8 pounds - yikes! Ya know how I've been joking that she has a luxury apartment in my womb? Well, it's true. I saw her couch and little jacuzzi all set up in there. I kid, I kid. But, I do have a ton of extra room and plenty of fluid. She moves all around still - some days her feet are on my left side, some days on my right. Her little bottom bumps right up under my belly button. Tons of room, I tell ya. So, if I was her, I probably wouldn't bother trying to come out either. She probably hears all the chaos out here & is thinking, I'll come out when I'm really big so that I can hold my own against those other noisy kids!! Tonight Warner dropped his sippy cup on the ground and she jumped in my belly. It was so funny! Glad she can hear! Anyway, I would appreciate your prayers that she comes out soon. I had Harper at 37 weeks 5 days, and she was 7 lbs 11 oz and very healthy.

Another reason I haven't been blogging much lately is that the Lord has really been taking me through some refining times. Motherhood is not easy, but it is refining. Some things He has been teaching me...

- I really want a natural birth/ VBAC not because 'I am woman, hear me roar' but because I have 4 little ones at home and frankly recovery wouldn't be as hard. I know that God made my body to birth a baby and to recover as well. My c-section was very hard to recover from - and I had zero complications. Just the fact that it was surgery made it difficult. I had an epidural with Harper, and her birth was beautiful. My back was sore off and on over the next few months where the epidural was placed - nothing horrible, though. I just know I would be back to 'myself' faster if I just did this au naturale. However, the Lord has been showing me that even if I do have to have a CS, it will be okay. This is really out of my control, and becoming a slightly increased possibility to a big and healthy baby! However, I do not need to fear what type of birth I have or when Haven will make her entrance. He has this all in His control, in His hands. He knows the desire of my heart, but I've got to trust that He knows whats best. I've planned the best that I can. I've informed myself, and set out to do what I think will be the best for my family. God may have something different in store, and I have to trust Him for that. These are some quotes I've read on Twitter the last few days that have really encouraged me:

Faith is having a positive attitude about

what you can do and

not worrying at all about what you can't do.

-Joyce Meyer

God knows the future.

You don't.

So stop worrying and make wise decisions.

Trust Him with the results.

- Clayton King

- The Lord has also really been refining me through being a mother. I saw this quote the other day on twitter and it pretty much sums up what the Lord has been bringing to light the last month or so...

You never really know yourself until you see yourself under pressure.

- Joyce Meyer

I will be honest on here and say that mothering 4 little ones - almost 5 little ones- under the age of 4 is a lot of pressure. Pressure like none I've ever experienced. And I wish I could say I'm holding up great! Piece of cake, no problem! But, while there is nothing detrimental is going on, I'm really not doing that great of a job. Lots of things came very naturally to me when I had babies. But now we have entered an age that I feel is quite foreign and I don't really know what to do. I am seeing very quickly that the foundation of these little lives are all up to me and Chris to lay for them. I could ignore some things, let some things slip by, but their foundation won't be as solid.

Now, I know a lot of my frustration (and joy) comes from the fact that I am *big* pregnant right now. Getting down to meet the eyes of a disobedient little boy or sassy little girl is about impossible. I've tried, but fail at consistency, and that frustrates me- causing the pressure to build. Little ones desperately need consistency. Not perfection, just to know boundaries. Boundary lines are drawn with consistency. I have not been offering this to them.

They not only need consistent boundary lines, but they need consistent love as well. I know they love me because they forgive so quickly and love whole-heartedly. I want the house to be happy, content, loving, secure and I realize that tone is set by me. Afternoons and meal times have become a major stresser for me, and I let that show too quickly. Not the vision of love and security I envisioned for my home. I raise my voice too often and shoo them out of the kitchen too much. I have 4 toddlers. Toddlers = picky = lots of food discarded = frustrated mama. I care about their nutrition, and seriously am sometimes at a loss. I don't know if I should just serve what they will eat so food won't be wasted, or just take the chance that lots of food will be wasted, but at least they have new and different things placed before them to try. Any suggestions?

Even though I have been very discouraged in my mothering skills as of late, the Lord has heard lots of my prayers and has brought me some great encouragement via books. No, I don't have tons of time to read, but I am so desperate to change my yucky, non consistent, loose-my-mind-at-dinner-time ways that I find time to read. 5 minutes when the kids are happily playing! 20 minutes or so at nap time, a few minutes before bed and voila - I've read about 45 minutes that day! And I can tell my attitude is changing... not quickly, but it is changing. I'm learning tools for having little ones and how to mold them effectively. I'm determined to change and become a better Mom...even if it's painful at times for me. Some of the books I'm going through bit by bit are:

* Ministry of Motherhood by Sally Clarkson
* Mission of Motherhood by Sally Clarkson
* Shepherding A Child's Heart by Ted Tripp
* Heartfelt Discipline: The Gentle Art of Training and Guiding Your Child by Clay Clarkson
* A Love That Multiplys (The Duggars new book)
* Loving the Little Years by Rachel Jankovic

All of these are really helping shape my role as a mother, give me a guide as to how to raise children who love the Lord - opposed to just doing what my parents did and crossing my fingers & hoping it works. Parenting has to be more intentional than that! (Mom and Dad, you did a great job - really you did!) Oh, and I realize my children all have free wills, but I am determined to be faithful on my part. I hope maybe one or all of them can encourage you, too!!

Anyway, I would love your prayers as I continue on this journey - in mothering and in waiting for our 5th child. Hope this transparent post breaks down any idea that I'm super mom. I love my babies. I still can't believe I have been blessed with 5 little, sweet and sticky babies in less than 4 years. I am grateful beyond words, but I need my Lord to change me if I'm going to be an effective Mama. Oh, and let me know how I can pray for you too. If only we could encourage each other more!!

Love,

Turbo Nesting & Harper the Photographer

2011-11-09T12:32:00.000-06:00

Well, I had all intentions of blogging today, and while I guess this technically IS a blog post, it's not what I had intended to write. I have mucho to update on the boys & Harps - from 1st day of preschool, to new haircuts, to dentist visits, etc, etc.   But, once everyone left the house, my turbo nesting need kicked into high gear and I cleaned the kitchen, did laundry, hung Christmas lights in Harper's room, ordered some stuff online, cleaned out the laundry room, organized all the kids' DVDs and organized my sewing area.   And this is only just a tiny bit of what I've been doing. It's ridiculous. I've gone through every room in the house over the past month or so and cleaned it out/ organized it: under counters, in drawers, all the kids clothes, all of our clohes, the medicine cabinet, the entertainment center, the coat closet, Haven's clothes, and on and on. We had a yard sale last weekend to get rid of the junk I found.

Nesting this time around has been nesting on steroids. I do not know if its because I am making up for the lost time that I needed to be off my feet when I was pregnant with the boys (so I couldn't nest), or if its because I know this is the last time I will experience the beauty of nesting. Or if it's because we could easily be HOLDING a baby in our arms in less 3 weeks! ( I will be full term in 3 weeks - not saying she's going to come out then, but it is a very realy possibility - Harps was born at 37 weeks/4 days) So, when I have a chance to work without being interrupted, I turbo charge through it. Then, I totally pay for it in the afternoon/evening. I had so many braxton hicks contractions this afternoon & evening.   Not good. But, when I'm nesting I.CANT.STOP. I'm making it a point to take it easy tomorrow with the boys and put my feet up in the BED on Thursday when everyone is at preschool. My Mama will be back in town next week, and I can nest more then (with more frequent rest times added in)!

Dinner has been awesome the last two nights. Thankful it isn't that crazy every.single.night. Everyone has eaten great & all/most of their dinner! Oh and tonight I didn't have to cook because we had Chick-fil-a! Everyone was happy!!!

And just because I think they are funny, here are some pics Harper has taken with my camera. The next Nancy Ray???   Whatcha think? :-)

Kind of artistic/ dramatic

Nice angle

She had lots of pictures of the potty. Personally, not my fave.

Me & Baby Haven

Love it!

The trash - hope there's nothing embarrassing in there. Lol

Artsy pic of Baby Carol (Harper's main lovey doll)

Maternity Pictures - Baby #5

2011-11-08T08:00:00.003-06:00

My precious sister, Nancy Ray, has taken maternity photos of me with all my sweet babes. For my birthday this year, that is what she gave me - a beautiful maternity session. We had so much fun laughing as she would get me to cooperate behind the camera. I couldn't believe how she has become so professional. I see the goofy, silly side all the time because that is what we bring out in each other. But, when it was time to take the pics, I was just blown away! She is so very talented and I love her so much. My favorite thing about her blog posts are what she writes - well, actually the pictures are pretty good too ;-). She gives such a very precious glimpse in the lives of her subjects. I cried when I read what she wrote about me. She is the one I admire and I learn from! So inspirational and beautiful. She is an incredible wife, business woman, Jesus-lover, friend, listener, laugher, and I love her so!


“A true friend is one soul in two bodies.”

I'm just going to send you over to her page to get a little glimpse of our session that day, as well as my other materinity sessions.

Oh, and by the way, I don't think we've properly announced our sweet baby girl's name on the blog.

Haven Joy

Haven - I found/ fell in love the name Haven when I was pregnant with the boys. My sister was in a band, Chasing Salem, when she was in high school & college. They released 2 CD's, and on the 2nd CD, there is a song called Home. I remember it being released when I was pregnant with Harps, and I would listen to it over and over - praying that Chris and I would make a home like is described in the song. It is a beautiful picture of the love of family as well as the love of our Heavnely Father. The name Haven wasn't given to me until I was pregnant with the boys and we were coming up with girl names just in case. :-) Chris and I both loved the named, and I think it is fitting for our tiny girl.

Here are some of the lyrics:

Upon my entrance, I am greeted

You were standing, you were waiting

On my arrival, nothing is needed

Nothing required, you just love me

For all I am, and all I'm not

You're acting just like your Father

Your my shelter, your my haven

your my home, your my home

If no one else ever understands

then, you know and I know

Also, I'm not looking at Haven to be my 'haven' - I have that in my Heavenly Father. However, I do believe that she is the completer of our family, and for that, the name just fits - our home is complete.

Joy - I pray that joy is what flows from her heart. I pray she brings joy to everyone she meets. And, I like that since she will be born close to Christmas, it has just a twinkle of Christmas in her name.

So, with out further ado, I present to you my precious maternity pictures that I hold close to my heart. Sweet miracles that we are only priviledge to carry for a short 9 months (if you make it that long! ha)

maternity pics with Haven

(pictures taken at 29 weeks)

maternity pics with Warner, Crews, and Maverick

(pictures taken at 25 weeks)

maternity pics with Harper

(pictures taken at 37 weeks)

Update : Dinner Edition

2011-11-07T14:23:00.003-06:00

Hey there! Boy, I have been awful at blogging lately. I'm hoping to have some time tomorrow while everyone is a preschool (pray they all stay healthy tonight! :-)) to get caught up on the blog.

Last night I tweeted about our crazy dinner. Chris had to be at church until 7pm, so I knew I had dinner on my own. With each passing week of this pregnancy, any normal activity can quickly turn into what looks like a mountain of a task. I'm so thankful that everything with this baby is healthy and I'm not on bedrest, but sometimes all I can think about is getting in bed. Last night was one of those nights. The kids rejected the dinner I served them - Maverick let me know by throwing a handful of it across the room. Teaching & disciplining when you are tired is very hard, too. I decided to retreat from the battle and tweet about it instead.

Warner ate some (yay!) but then started lining his potatoes up like little soldiers.

Crews started throwing a fit when I put the plate in front of him (he's the pickiest), but I'm also trying to work with him to know he doesn't get a special order. - if he got one, they would all want one (So far, we've conquered apples & grapes - they used to go flying across the room, but now, he eats them - yay! So, I know there is hope...it's just a tough battle sometimes.) And then Maverick, well, you know what M did - oh, he also scootched his chair as far away as he could from the table. Yes, that would be Crews throwing his fit on the floor below.

Harper, ate a teensy bit, but then decided to sing us a Veggie Tales song while Crews was throwing his fit (sooo loud in our house at times!). Well, she got the words all mixed up and then got so very tickled at herself that she didn't want to eat anymore.

By the time Chris had gotten home, I had taken everyone out of their highchairs (I didn't even try to get them to eat anything), and they were running circles around our living room. I was filing my nails. Yes, I had lost all control & I chose to retreat. I was exhausted and weepy.

We fed them sunbutter & bread and then had a fun evening of laughing at our gang. Warner was just walking around talking to himself. He loves giving kisses, so he crawled up in Chris' lap and kissed him over and over again. Too cute & funny!

By the time we had gotten everyone in jammies & upstairs, we had noticed Mav carrying something. I thought it was a rock, but once Chris had pried his little chubby hand opened, we discovered it was a nice and sweaty lima bean! We could not stop laughing.

We have our crazy times when I think the house might fall down, but then they are usually followed by the sweetest times - laughter, kisses, hugs, & toddler sweetness.

And like I said, pregnancy only exaggerates the craziness even more! I know I'm in my final month when I get to the weepy stage. The other day I just cried because I felt like - no other reason. Come on baby!

Finally, A Post : 31 Weeks & 4 days

2011-10-21T14:23:00.000-05:00

Hey Friends!

I have been missing from blog world for quite awhile!! However, we are doing well! Just busy busy busy. Once I have time to blog (at night or during nap time), I just want to sleep or do something where I don't have to think. But, while I have a quiet moment, I did want to do a quick survey so that our sweet baby girl knows that this pregnancy has been on my heart and mind just as much as my other pregnancies. It just may not be quite as documented as the other ones. :-) Although, I do journal a lot, and that is some documentation. I definitely think I've been holding this pregnancy a little closer to my heart as I know it will be the last one.

So, before I do the survey, I'm trying to think of any updates. I went to the midwife to do my glucose screening for diabetes. I love those drinks - I know...so weird! The week & weekend before my appointment, I had been so tired that I would just cry at night. Not every night, but I was definitely so tired that my bones hurt and I was extra emotional. I was very discouraged in thinking how I would be able to keep this up another 10 weeks! I figured it was from being a mom to 4 little ones during the day as well as being pregnant. The Monday after my test the nurse called and said I passed my glucose test, but I was pretty anemic. I told her 'Oh Good!!' I knew there had to be a reason I was sooo exhausted these past few weeks. I've been on an iron prescription ever since & after about 5 days of taking it, I could tell such a differnece. Am I still tired? Yes, but not nearly as EXHAUSTED as I was. So thankful for these tests and for supplements!!

We also had an ultrasound for baby girl done at 30 weeks. It was so cool! I had to have my placenta checked out as it was 'low-lying' at 20 weeks, but praise the Lord - it moved all the way up to the top of my uterus as baby has grown!! I was sooo thankful as now I can proceed with my desire to have a VBAC. I will post some pics soon when I can figure out how to get them off the disk!

Now, here is the classic survey :-)

How far along? 31 weeks and 4 days

Total weight gain: I've stopped weighing myself. I eat nutritious food and drink lots of water. My body is just going to do what its going to do. I will work to lose the weight after baby arrives.

Maternity clothes? yes yes yes! My belly is large!!!

Stretch marks? Haven't noticed any new ones after the boys stretched my tummy out.

Sleep: Not great. I am tired all the time & definitely nap during the day for *at least* 30 minutes while the kids are napping. I'm up about every 3 hours to go potty at night & heartburn is now something fierce. I love Pepcid, but even that seems to be losing the battle with my tummy. Propping up with lots of pillow helps with the heart burn, but doesn't give a great night's sleep. That's okay, I know it's just another way God designed my body to help adjust to waking with a newborn.

Best moment this week: Right now. The boys have been sick with tummy issues this week, so they couldn't go to preschool today. Warner & Harper are better, so they went on in, but Maverick and Crews stayed home with me. (Side note: I really like it when just one or two of the kids get to stay home. It allows me special time with them & they love not having to share mommy so much. I realized that Maverick knows the entire alphabet today! Way to go buddy!) Instead of me packing M & C up, shortening their naps & mine, Chris is leaving work early and bringing home H & W. Such a blessing to me!!!!

Movement: She moves all the time - most active in the evening, but I can feel her rolling around all through the day. She gets the hiccups a lot, too.

Food cravings: vanilla ice cream, Sonic Ice (hello anemia!!), and protein of any kind, but mostly red meat.

Gender: definitely a girl! We had it confirmed that she is definitely a girl at our last ultrasound.

Labor Signs: Quite a few Braxton Hicks & painful hips - my body is getting ready!! After sitting or lying down, it takes me a few seconds to hobble around before my hips start working again.

Belly Button in or out? It is definitely a outie and it kind of grosses me out. haha! It never popped out with Harper, and with the boys I don't remember it popping out either - just being stretched flat. It definitely pops out and you can see it through my clothes - yuck!

Wedding rings on or off? On!!! They still fit!!! I seriously can't believe it. They have never made it this far before! lol

What I miss: Really playing with the kids. I'm always warning them - watch Mommy's tummy or I can't carry you right now. I know it's just for a little bit longer, but I can't wait to run and play and tumble with them!

What I am looking forward to: My Mom coming next week. Getting more stuff ready for baby's arrival!

Weekly Wisdom: I'm really trying to soak in being pregnant. To enjoy the rolls, pokes, and jabs. To not just want to pass out when I walk by a mirror and see my giant belly and double chins. Pregnancy is such a miracle! My body is only transformed this way for a brief amount of time.

Milestones:Getting Harper's old clothes out, rearranging clothes & furniture to get ready for a new baby! Crews patting and kissing my belly saying Be-Be. Harper talking to baby every day & telling her she loves her so much and she can't wait for her to be born so she can bathe her and watch Tinkerbelle with her and help change her diaper. :-) Precious sisters!

I also have realized that I'm almost 32 weeks! I remember... with Harper, at this point I felt like I would be pregnant forever, and with the boys our big goal was 32 weeks, so I felt like anything over that was a really long time. This time, I can't believe I'm almost 32 weeks & I' m not ready for it to be over yet! It is going by so fast, and while I can't wait to hold her in my arms, I have lots to do before she arrives!!! I've been nesting like crazy - cleaning the oven, the pantry, the fridge, cleaning out clothes, getting ready for a yard sale, etc etc etc. I need to slllloooowwww this train down and enjoy my little ballerina in my tummy!

31 weeks

Today's Craziness

2011-08-08T22:57:00.000-05:00

So, today was one of the craziest days we've had in a long time. Every day has a dash of craziness thrown in, but today was just insane. If you follow me on Twitter, you read most of it. But, I wanted to do a little recap for the blog. I know one day I will look back on this and laugh. I actually laughed a lot today - mostly out of disbelief something else was happening.

The morning started off weird b/c everyone slept in! That was great! Then it just went crazy from there. Crews and Warner started fighting in the hallway while I was doing laundry. I hear Harper scream and say Oh No!!! She is quite dramatic. Crews had somehow busted Warner's lip and he was bleeding everywhere. I got him cleaned up. No big deal.

Then, before lunch we were listening to Christmas music and coloring. Everyone was doing so well. I was fixing lunch while it was so peaceful. When I go to deliver plates to everyone, Maverick is sitting there chomping away on a red crayon. He had already eaten half of it! Guess he didn't want to wait for lunch! Lol! It was disgusting though, red wax all in his teeth and red drool all down his shirt. Definitely looked like a vampire.

The boys were constantly fighting today. Crews wound up in time out more times then I could count! He has always been passive with the other two, but boy oh boy, the last two weeks his little fighter has come out and he is quite aggressive.

Once naptime arrived I thought I was going to catch a break. Well, Harper went to the bathroom and called me to come help her. Right as I got there, she told me she was going to spray some bathroom spray. Before I knew it she was screaming like crazy. She had sprayed it right in her eye! The next 20 minutes were quite crazy as she was crying and crying. i know that had to hurt! I flushed her eye with water, much to her dismay, and that seemed to help some.

She went down for her nap, and I finished some laundry and then got to lay down for about 15 minutes before she was screaming from a dream. She slept for a total of about 45 minutes. Oh well.

Once the boys were up, we had snacks, and everyone was happy. I started dinner, and Harper helped me make some oatmeal raisin cookies. Some how between putting cookies in the over & managing dinner, Maverick finds the trash and helps himself to an egg shell! Awesome! I am praying praying praying that he does not get salmonella! At this point Chris gets home! Yay! Back up!!

We eat dinner, then the boys go upstairs to play. Chris was busy doing something & I hear an awful cry. I run upstairs and Maverick is bleeding everywhere! He had busted his lip!!!! I laugh at this point - REALLY!?

Finally it is bedtime for the boys and some relief is in sight! Chris takes Harper's bedtime routine and I get in the bath! Aaah!! And, for my children to know one day, I am not complaining when I write this! I wouldn't have wanted to spend today anywhere but here - even if I did feel like I was losing my mind! :-) I just really want to record these details so I can tell them stories about the stuff they did when they were little! hah!

Here's to an easier tomorrow!

PS... Baby girl just kicked so hard she made my tummy jump! Chris, also, got to feel a good hard kick tonight! Grow little one, grow! 21 weeks

Boy or Girl???

2011-08-03T08:00:00.029-05:00

So the orignal post "Boy or Girl???" was supposed to go up this morning while we were at the ultrasound place. Blogger did not go by 'my instructions.' So, I'm starting with the original post, and adding our 'results' at the end of this post. (go ahead, scroll allll the way down to watch the video :) I KNOW you want to!)

Original post:
I thought I would record what I think this baby is going to be & old wives tales. Hoping baby cooperates tomorrow! I'm a little reserved about finding out the sex of the baby as I have read about 2 different people (blogs I follow) having been told the wrong sex recently!!! I'm going to have the ultrasound tech point out everything to us tomorrow! ha!

Okay, so here we go:

My Instinct: From about week 9 or 10, I've thought this baby is a girl more than I've thought its a boy. This pregnancy reminds me sooo much of my pregnancy with Harper - but, I know each pregnancy is different. I've also had days where I am convinced this is a boy. But, if I have to go with my 'gut' instinct, I would say it's leaned more toward girl than boy. Girl

Dreams : So, I've heard both sides - if you dream it's a girl, then you will have a boy/ dream boy, you will have a girl. But, I've also heard what you dream is what you get. This one helps a whole lot - huh? However, I never once had a dream about a boy baby when pregnant with Harper, and never once dreamed about a girl baby when pregnant with the boys. Weird, huh? In the beginning of this pregnancy, I dreamed another boy was added to our family, but it wasn't really vivid. 3 nights ago I had the most vivid dream that I gave birth to a little girl who looked just like my sister. She had auburn/brown hair that was curly, and weighed 8lbs 1 oz. ha! We'll see how true this holds up, I guess. Oh, and my mom has had some dreams and they have always been that this baby is a girl. I'm going to go with my super vivid dream & say this points to a Girl

Cravings: More like food aversions. If I had to say I craved things it would be fruit (lemons, apples, pineapple). That leans more toward girl.

Heart Rate: Has been 135 & 138. Old wives tales say if its less than 140, it means boy, so I would say boy for this one. ( I don't remember Harper's heartrate or the boys' heartrates at all) Boy

Shape of Belly: Once again, no help. I have extra skin (gross, I know) from my pregnancy with the trips that throws this belly shape thing out of whack. Watermelon? Basketball? I have no idea. I haven't really gained in my hips or thighs, though, so I guess I would say boy

Hair on Legs: grows faster than before pregnancy = boy. My leg hair seems to have slowed down! So girl

Ring Test: getting ready to do this with Harper when she wakes up from her nap. I will see if I remember to update this one later. :-) This one has always been confusing to me though! ha!

Side I rest on: In the beginning of this pregnancy, it was always my left side. But now, I always wake up on my right. So, once again - no help!

Morning Sickness: Oh good gravy - all day sickness. Even yesterday I was sick & feeling awful (20 weeks, people!)- girl.

Nose: If your nose seems to have grown wider = boy. My nose has not grown wider (yet). I must say it did with the boys! Soooo, I guess girl.

Chinese Gender Chart: says girl.

Girl: 7
Boy:2

Hah! Well, looks like its a girl going by all this stuff. We will see. You may be wondering what I 'want.' Of course a healthy baby (what mom isn't going to say that?!) When I first found out I was pregnant, I really wanted another girl. I wanted Harper to experience having a sister because my sister is so precious to me (my brother is, too, but it's just different). I voiced my concern to Chris, and he made a very good point. He said, Harper may not need a sister. The path that God has planned for her, Warner, Crews, & Maverick may need a little brother. He also said, if baby #5 wasnt a girl, it would just make my relationship with Harper all the more special - we'll be the only girls! After talking to him, my heart really was put at peace with having a boy or a girl! I am praying that baby is healthy, and that the tech can get all the measurements right away. I hope to find out if baby is a boy or girl, too! I'm going to take some sweet tea with me to get baby moving if I need to! ha!

Can't wait to update tomorrow! Little baby is moving around like crazy in my tummy right now! Oh, and we felt the baby kick from the outside for the first time 2 nights ago! I sooooo love this part about pregnancy!!!

One more note: Harper only refers to this baby as 'she/her.' I told her it might be a baby brother, and she says very seriously, 'But Mommy, it's a baby girl, not a boy.' I've tried to tell her we don't know yet, but she is very convinced (and has been from the beginning) that it is a girl.

Update:

Baby is healthy and very active! My due date is right on track for mid-December (18th)! Baby weighed in at 14 oz. We wanted Harper to be the first one to know. Chris and I did find out in the ultrasound room because I needed the girl to show me all the parts to know if it was a boy or girl!!! :-) We got an awesome DVD of the entire ultrasound!

Edited to add: The ladies in the video are our precious Jean & Debbie! They have kept the boys & Harper since the boys were 5 weeks old. They come every Thursday to help out with the kids and to let me get out of the house :-) We were sooo happy they were able to celebrate the big news with us! They were sooo excited that they scared the boys - lol! Harper is over the moon to have a sister on the way, and the boys are clueless! Although, Crews will point at my tummy, then point at his. Lol!

Summer Vacation: Travel Home

2011-08-02T15:29:00.000-05:00

We were ready to be home after 2 fun and eventful weeks! My Dad was so awesome to make the trip back with us! The trip home was a bit more eventful than the trip there. I think we were all just exhausted, but we survived and have great stories to tell!!! We flew from Myrtle Beach to Charlotte, then from Charlotte to Nashville.

The first flight went well. Everyone was excited to be on a plane again. We had fresh snacks, toys, coloring books, etc. And, the flight was only 45 minutes. Smooth as can be...other than Maverick pooping. :-) But, that was at the end of the flight, so we waited until we landed and I could change him easier.

We had an hour layover in Charlotte & lots to do. On my list - change the boys, let Harper potty, get something to eat for everyone, and let the boys run/stretch their legs for a little bit. Well, as soon as we got there, we changed the boys. Then we found our gate and plopped our 5 bags, 2 double strollers, 4 tired kids, and 3 hungry adults down. I went to find a potty with Harper. When we returned, Chris had scouted out some food places at the food court. The only thing appetizing to this crowd was Burger King. He had checked out the line & there was a 20 minute wait on food. I sent him to order as our tiny natives were growing very very restless. Once the order was placed, he came back and got Harper and Maverick - to take them on a little walk. I told Dad to stay put with the stuff, and i would take Warner and Crews. Looking back, I should have sent my Dad with Warner and Crews, but oh well.

The next 10 minutes could easily be described as my most humiliating public mothering experience to date. (Note: we don't go out in public very much). I grabbed Warner and Crews' little hands (they had just started to hold hands & walk like civilized little people the previous week or so). They were so big and cute laughing and smiling while they walked through the airport. I must say I did have a proud Mama moment as they were doing so well! (Doesn't the Bible say pride comes before the fall?!?) We walked through the food court, and a bit further down the terminal until we came to to the moving sidewalk. I knew better than to even attempt that, so I said okay boys, we need to turn around now. Oh dear - bad choice of words! We started to make the u-turn, but Warner and Crews wanted NOTHING to do with it. They both threw themselves on the ground, pitching royal fits. Two babies turning beet red and screaming at the top of their lungs. We were the center of attention. I tried to grab their little hands and pull them up, but I couldn't. I was trying to get them to stop - to no avail. My attempts were just making them more mad! Neither Chris or my Dad were anywhere in sight, so I had to do this alone. I grabbed Warner like a sack of flour, then mustered up all my energy & said a prayer for the baby in my tummy and grabbed Crews like a sack of flour - both up under my arms. They were still flailing, kicking, and screaming. We had to walk back through the terminal, then through the food court (did I mention it was LUNCH time?!), then through more terminal, and finally to our gate. I was sweating and red as could be by the time we made it to the gate. I also really wanted to cry, but I didn't. I'm sure that I had many ' oh bless her heart' looks. As well as, many people thinking, ' she has twins and one on the way!' (haha - little do they know!!)

Anyway, we were all spent by the time Chris returned with the food. We had to sit at the gate with all the passengers (who I'm sure were dreading the flight by now) and eat hamburgers. The boys were just done & so was Harper. I scarfed a hamburger down while trying to feed the others. There were some very gracious passengers nearby that made me feel much better. It's just amazing the people the Lord places in your path. One elderly lady had had a singleton (one baby) and shortly after had twins. She was very sweet and telling me to enjoy these days! Another lady, who was pregnant, came up to ask where I had gotten the boys bags (they were gifts). I asked her how far along she was & we were both due in December, and both self concious about our bigger than average bellies - ha- this was her 3rd baby! I was calmed down after the tantrum fun, and we were soon boarding the plane.

This plane ride was 1 & 1/2 hours, and not nearly as nostalgic as the first plane ride. Poor Dad had Maverick who decided to get his tantrum in while we were on the plane. (Hey, at least the other 2 got their's out on land, right!?) I had Crews & Harper again. Crews slept for about 45 minutes on me (precious boy!) & Harps was very good - a little fussy, but good. Once Crews woke up, I traded babies with Dad. Maverick came back and rode with me & Harper. We were all so excited when we landed!

The man's arm with the blue shirt, right across from Chris has 4 kids - 1 girl & 3 boys - 2 boys are identical twins! He was very encouraging and so kind! So cool the people God placed in our path!

We were at the very back of the plane :-)

My travel buddies

My dear friend, Arica, was waiting for us at the airport! She had driven our van, and then helped us load the luggage and kiddos. She then had a friend pick her up. She is so precious! Dad walked us out to the car, helped us load carseats, luggage, babies, etc. Then he walked back into the airport and flew back to Myrtle Beach!!!! I'm sure he was exhausted by the time he made it back to the beach - however, I bet those 2 plane rides back were the calmest and quietest he has ever had - lol!

Arica & me

Chris & my Dad - precious. Love these two men!

Me and my sweet Daddy

As we drove out of the airport, this was the view in the back seat.

So happy to have visited with family! So happy to be home!

And that is our trip! I can't believe I blogged the whole thing! lol! Stay tuned tomorrow (Wednesday)... we find out if Baby Blanton is a boy or girl!!! Pray for us at 10 AM (CST) - for things to go smoothly and for baby to be healthy! Will report back tomorrow! WooHoo!

Summer Vacation: Myrtle Beach

2011-08-01T14:47:00.000-05:00

We drove to Myrtle Beach with the help of Aunt Nancy and Uncle Will. We stopped at Chickfila and the boys did such a great job! Nean, Matt, Mom, Nancy, Will, Me & Chris were all there to guide the little ones while they ate. I guess anything would go smooth when you have 7 adults to 4 children - hah!

The drive was a little crazy. Nancy and Will had Crews and Harper in their car, and Chris and I had Warner and Maverick in our rental car. Nancy and I would text back and forth - 'is your car as loud as our car?!' Usually while one car was hollerin', the other was sleeping. We stopped at a Burger King about an hour before we got to MB to play on the playground. Everyone had such a good time despite it being a 100* in the play area. (at least it felt that way to me!) Harps even crawled up and through once, but the second time got stuck. We had to send a little girl up to rescue her.

Once we arrived at the beach after a 3 1/2 hour drive, we unloaded the car and got settled. We then went down to the pool. I was so excited as I thought everyone would love it! WRONG again! It was a shallow pool with sand covering the bottom. The boys got in and freaked out! Harper adored the water, and spent most of her time in this pool. Maverick had fun being swirled around in his baby float, but Warner and Crews were less than thrilled and let everyone in North Myrtle Beach know it! We ordered pizza and ate poolside - which again was a teensy bit stressful because everyone was tired and cranky from no/small naps that day. Nancy and I looked at each other & she says 'my pizza is lodge right here (pointing at her chest) because I'm a little stressed.' That cracked me up as my pizza was stuck there too! We were all tired after that and very thankful that bedtime was right around the corner!

The next day, we went to the Splash pool which was a lot of fun! The boys still had a tough time with all the water, but we had enough adults to carry & guide them through. It was some work, but I think everyone had fun. There were lots of slides, sprinkler things, and a lazy river (I could have stayed there alllll day!) After a snack and a little more play time, we ordered lunch. There is something about sitting by the pool, eating a hamburger, and having the sun on your skin that brings me back to my childhood. I wish we could have stayed longer, but we had to leave due to thunder. We all went inside and napped. Nancy, Will, and I went for a walk on the beach and then came in and read.

One evening before Nancy and Will left, we decided to attempt the beach. It was a good thing we had extra hands to help! The boys had fun running on the beach, but once they got into the water - just up to their knees, they screamed and screamed. It stung their eczema so bad! Poor little guys! We ran them up to the hoses and washed them off. I loved the sand between my toes and watching my kids play.


The Blanton Family 2011- Crews, Mama (baby in tummy), Harper, Maverick, Daddy, Warner

The Whole Gang

It sounds like the boys had rough time with everything they did - well, kind of - it's just the age we are at right now. But, they did also have fun just being with family! One thing we could always count on them LOVING to do - RUN the hallway!! :-)

After a few nights of fun at the condo, Chris and I went out on a date night! It was so fun! We went to my favorite restaurant Chesapeake House. All I could think about was crab legs for the last few weeks! (Just a side note: when I was pregnant with Harper, all I could think about was crab legs, too.) It was sooo wonderful. I'm still thinking about those crab legs. yum!! After dinner, we walked around Barefoot Landing. I was exhausted by about 9pm, so we went home.

Also included in this collage is pics of our celebration of the boys' 2nd birthday (July 16th) and my Dad's 61st birthday (July 10th)! Leslie had made a cookie cake for all the boys. The boys were so funny and would cover their ears when we sang to them. :-)

Our beach trip was lots of fun and lots of work. Just like the Lake, we look forward to going to the beach with our family when we can see Harper and the boys enjoy it more. It was sooo good to get out and visit family, though, and I am so glad we went to visit!

Thank you ALL so much for your help and hospitality! We hope we weren't too much trouble! We had lots of fun and look forward to coming back!

Love!

19 Weeks : Almost Half Way!

2011-07-24T09:00:00.000-05:00

I can't believe we are almost half way through this pregnancy! In some ways, I feel like I should already be approaching the finish line, but in others I feel like I just found out I'm pregnant. I am just now beginning to feel better - thank you Jesus! I still have heartburn and some nausea at night, but have much more energy!

How Far Along: 19 Weeks

Size of baby: Baby is the size of an heriloom tomato!

Total Weight Gain/Loss: Gained 18 lbs - Wowzers!

Maternity Clothes: Yes! Love dresses & jammies! :-)

Gender: Can't wait to find out! August 3rd!

Movement: I've been feeling the baby move at night. Small flutters, rolls but can tell baby is getting stronger.

Sleep: Much better now that I take Pepcid before I go to sleep.

What I miss: Nothing right now. I am trying to enjoy this pregnancy because I know it will be done before I know it.

Cravings: milk, pickles, tuna fish, apples, red gatorade (I think this baby might be tinted pink from all the red gatorade I've had to drink. I just can't stop drinking it - it tastes sooo good!)

Symptoms: nausea and heartburn at night. Hot all the time!

Best Moment this week: Feeling the baby more and more. Feeling better!

And, I have belly pics!! I say this baby has a luxury condo in there!

17 1/2 Week Belly

All my sweet blessings! Warner, Harper, Crews, Maverick

Summer Vacation : Lake Gaston

2011-07-23T13:11:00.015-05:00

I grew up going to Lake Gaston. My parents bought this when I was in 8th grade! I love all the wonderful memories that I have here, and I was so happy to share it with my kiddos. The last time I was there, Harper was 4 months old. It was fun to see her enjoy it this time.

When we arrived, we decided to take the boys and Harps out to the Lake so they could stretch their legs. Mom would hold Crews' hand, I would hold Maverick's hand, and Nancy would hold Warner's hand. Harper is a bit wary of new situations, so I knew she would stay close by. Harper was fine and behaved just like I expected, but the boys not so much. The boys' didn't want to hold our hands, but when we let their hands go, they would bolt towards the Lake. We would grab their hands again & they would flop and flail and scream on the ground. It was no fun. We decided to take them over to the beach area of the Lake since it was shallow. Well, Maverick and Warner ran head first into the Lake and face planted. I ran into the lake after them and yanked them out by their clothes. Oh yea, did I mention we all still had our clothes on!? Nancy grabbed Warner, I grabbed Maverick, Mom grabbed Crews - who was still dry and on the beach (angel child - lol) - and carried each one up to the garage. They were screaming and acting like nuts. I must say I was quite discouraged at this point!!

We figured out the next day that we would put up some baby pools up closer to the house. The kiddos couldn't leave the house without a Puddlejumper on and an adult close by! And, to my great pleasure - it worked! Harper went into the Lake a few times with me, but overall the baby pools are where all the kids hung out the entire time.

lots of piano was ~~played~~ banged on when we were inside!

Sweetest Feet!

After being there 2 days, I had 2 of my best friends come to visit. We have known each other since elementary school and grew up dancing together. I don't have a picture of this, but our guest book at Lake Gaston showed that the 3 of us (plus Tara's sister, Leah - who couldn't make it) were there 13 years and 1 day ago! It was so crazy! We would never think there would be 10 - almost 11 kids between the 4 of us one day. Tara has 4 kids - Nathan & Natalie (4) and Samuel & Samantha (1) - yes 2 sets of twins! Crystal has adorable Mr. Owen (8 months), and Leah has Emery (4 months) - we MISSED you, so.

Crystal, Me, & Tara

Y'all, I figured out how to make a collage, and I kind of went crazy with it!

I feel like a computer genius!!!

(click picture to view in larger size - hopefully this will work - ha)

Tara has an awesome post of all of our fun we had together HERE. Ya know, if you want more details! We had fun playing in the lake, the baby pools, eating pizza, talking and laughing. All the little ones took amazing naps, and all my babes slept amazing that night! It was such a fun way to begin our vacation!

The rest of our visit we had fun hanging out with our big and crazy wonderful family. I can't wait until we are able to return with little ones a bit older and independent!


Aunt Susan gets her own pic :-) It was too confusing to add to the collages.

My identical twin uncles with my identical triplets! Crazy!

Also, if you want to see some more incredible pics from our lake time & a preview of our beach time go see Nancy's photos .

Up Next: 19 Week Update & then Myrtle Beach!

Summer Vacation 2011: Travel to NC

2011-07-21T21:26:00.000-05:00

We are home and recuperating from our fun and busy 2 week vacation to the Carolinas. I am hoping to do a lot of sitting this week as I am worn out from traveling! Hopefully that means this little ol' bloggy will be attended to since I'm sitting down. :-)

This post is a wordy one as I want to remember what traveling with 4 kids under 4 was like. I think if I don't write it down, I may block it from my memory. Ha! It really wasn't that bad, just very exhausting.

The first part of our vacation started when Mom and Nean (my Aunt, Jean - nicknamed 'Nean' by me at age 2) flew here Saturday June 25. Sunday was an all out day of packing and cleaning while we traded off herding tots from room to room (so they wouldn't mess up what we had already done!) Everyone pitched in cleaning (even Nean cleaned my oven & stove!!!) Harper adores my Mom, so she followed her around everywhere she went while we were getting ready. Sunday night, my dear sweet friend, Arica came over to spend the night so we could be up bright and early Monday AM to leave for the airport. Another friend, Dabney, came to meet us early Monday morning so we could have an extra car. She drove Mom, Nean, & our luggage. Arica drove Me & the kids. (Chris had already left for summer camp. He would meet us in NC on Thursday after camp was over)

**Side note: Arica is such a blessing to our family! We were introduced through a dear friend when the boys were 5 weeks old. Arica started coming over to help with feedings and our friendship grew from there. She is definitely part of our family here in Nashville and is like an aunt to my kids. She is such a servant and has cleaned my house/ taken care of my kids/ stayed with me while Chris has been gone/ etc. Arica moved from Texas to Tennessee because God told her to! What an obedient heart! Many times I tell her God moved her here for me!!! :-)

We were all packed Sunday night, so Monday AM we woke up at 5:30 AM, had the kids ready to go by 6:30 & were in the car by 6:45. It was quite an adventure as Harper threw up on the way to the airport! Gaaah! I think she was so excited that she wouldn't eat breakfast - just had a few sips of my Mom's protein shake- and then was a little car sick. I was sooo thankful I had packed an extra set of clothes for her in her carry on. I thought there is no way she will need these, but I better be safe than sorry! Yay for overpacking! :-) She was all cleaned up by the time we reached the airport.

We arrived at the airport & unloaded the kids into their double strollers, unpacked the luggage, then un-fastened all the carseats. We were definitely a spectacle. We got all checked in & made it through security. The boys pitched a royal fit when we had to take off their shoes to walk them through the scanner thing. Some sweet lady that we didn't know stopped to help us put back on all their shoes :-)

We got to the gate, got a bite to eat, and then took the kids to play on a playground set up in the Nashville Airport (genius!!!!!Thank you BNA!) They had a blast! These are only pictures I took of our travel to NC.

Maverick trying to put his shoes back on...oh, how these boys are obsessed with their shoes!

Nean and Warner

Harper and Crews playing (notice Crews carrying around his shoes)

Before we knew it, it was time to board. We changed their diapers very quickly, had a few last bathroom visits, and clanked our way onto the plane. Mom sat with Harper and Crews, I had Warner, and Nean had Maverick. Because they are lap children, we couldn't all sit in the same row (has to do with oxygen masks if needed). So I sat across from Mom, and Nean sat diagonal across the aisle from me. Crews was so easy going on the plane, and Harper was, too. Maverick and Warner did a great job, but definintely had their moments. Nean and I would just laugh and look at Crews and call him 'Angel Child.' We survived the 1 hour & 15 minute ride with lots of snacks, books, ice, cups, & a few screams. I think it went great! :-)

Nancy & Will picked us up at the airport. Mom and Nean had their cars there, too. We loaded up the carseats (thank you Uncle Will!!!) and headed to Johnny (my brother) & Megan's new house! The boys were at their grouchiest & were super hungry. Thankfully, Aunt Megan had picked up Chickfila and had it waiting on us when we arrived! We managed to not destroy too much of their home, and were soon on our way to the Lake. But, not without Warner finding a drainage ditch and sitting down in it! (It had just rained a ton!) Awesome. Quick outfit change & we were on our way.

Nancy took me by Jubala Coffee which has the BEST coffee I have ever tasted...and super yummy Liege Belgium Waffles (these aren't your Mama's waffles!) but the yummiest dessert/doughnut with a crispy outer shell of pure sweetness! Harper, Nancy and I shared a chocolate chip waffle and Nancy and I had a Vanilla Latte. Oh yummy - I want some now! I hope Andrew (owner of Jubala & youth group friend of mine) opens his second location in Nashville!!!

We finished our drive to Lake Gaston with kids dozing in the car.

Harper's Night Night

2011-07-12T14:14:00.000-05:00

It is amazing how fast time flies. I have been meaning to write this post for a while, but I kept thinking, Harper is going to be doing this routine for the rest of her life, so I don't need to rush to record it. How wrong I was! We have recently returned from our summer vacation (working on posts for that now!), and while we were gone, our routine was lost. We got home and Harper has just grown up more! She now tells me when she is ready to go to bed (I realize this probably won't last very long), and she will get her babies and paci (yes, she still has one) and climb up into bed to wait for us to read her ONE book and sing her ONE song.

So, before we left for vacation, here is what bedtime looked like:

We would put the boys to bed, and then Harper would have about 30-45 minutes with just Mom and Dad. We would usually eat a snack and snuggle on the sofa. Depending on who's turn it was to put H to bed, Chris or I would coax Harper upstairs to brush her teeth and go potty. (I have to admit, Chris and I would kind of push bedtime duty on each other because it was a looooongg routine, but now that the routine has come to an end, I find myself trying to extend it a bit by singing an extra song or reading one more book)

Harper would have to get paci (which is in the bed) and Baby Carol (which could be anywhere in the house). If I was on my game, I would remember to look for her before we would start bedtime routine, but usually, I was soooo tired, I would forget and we would spend a bit of tiem looking for BC.

We would then pick out 2-3 books to read. Then say prayers. Then sing 2 songs. Usually Jesus Loves Me and The Birdie Song. We would kiss and turn out the lights. Oh, and we can't forget the last sip of water that would always pop into Harper's head as soon as she was snug as a bug in a rug. Thankfully, I keep a sippy cup by her bed, so I don't have to go into the bathroom or kitchen to get one. I would kiss her again, re-tuck her in, and then, as I'm leaving, Harper would always say this...

H: "Mommy, is there thunder and lighting (not lightening) tonight?"

Me: "No, Baby. Not tonight. (or if there was, I would tell her there might be but Mommy and Daddy are right here and Jesus is always with her, too).

H: Okay, well, if I need you I will say (and she would yell this as if she were in practice mode) Mommy, I need to go potty. Or Daddy, I need to go potty. Or Mommy, I need some water. Or Daddy I need some water. Or Mommy, I need to rock. Or Daddy, I need to rock." (she would say all of that in what seemed like one breath, quite loudly- and it would always make Chris and me laugh)

Me: Okay, Harper. We'll be right here as always.

H: Okay, well, leave the door a teeny, tiny, little bit cracked and leave the light on out in the hallway.

Me: Of course I will.

After a few weeks of saying 'leave the light on out in the hallway' she would go ahead and add my comment onto hers. So she would say, '...well leave the light on out in the hallway of course you will. ' haha!

Me: I love you so much, Harper Grace.

H: I love you too, Mommy.

Me: Night night, sleep tight.

Then, I would leave the door a teeny tiny little bit cracked and the laundry room light on and go downstairs. Only occasionally would she call me back, and I usually knew exactly why - only when we would leave out part of our nightly conversation... if she forgot to ask about thunder & lighting or to leave the light on... I could usually count on it.

Children are so funny, and while their routines can sometimes feel like you are stuck in the Groundhog's Day movie, they are reassuring and comforting to them. Appreciate every day because it could be the last time that routine is ever done. I know I will hang onto them a bit more now.

15 Weeks

2011-06-26T12:00:00.000-05:00

I can't believe I'm 15 weeks today!!

Baby is the size of an apple. And because apples are the ONLY food that are magic in making me feel better, I figured I would do a survey this week :-)

How far along?

15 weeks

Total weight gain/loss:

about 12 lbs. Yikes! This is more than I gained with the triplets at this point. Not worrying about it though. I'm eating healthy foods as junk really makes me feel sick (fries, chips, sugar). I think my body is just going to do what it needs to do and I know it will regulate after I have the baby. It always has before - might need to help it along with some exercise & Weight Watchers, but I will have 5 kids to chase, so I'm sure it will come off.

Maternity clothes?

Yes and no. I am actually kind of over maternity clothes. Wearing them for about the last 2-3 years makes them not nearly as fun as the first go round! I am actually wearing lots of dresses & then lounge clothes during the day.

Stretch marks?

Just all the ones I accumulated from the boys!!

Sleep:

It's okay, not great. I love it when I wake up and realize I haven't woken up in 4-5 hours. I am already going to the bathroom at least 2 times at night.

Best moment this week:

Having some really good days with no nausea.

Worst moment this week:

Having some really bad days with lots of nausea.

Movement:

You may think I'm crazy, but I have felt this baby move since 10 weeks. It's not constant, but every few days I will feel a flutter, kick, or a roll. They were very very faint in the beginning and are slowly getting stronger. I usually feel baby if I'm sitting with my legs crisscrossed on the couch. I guess I just know what baby kicks feel like now and am super sensitive to them.

Food cravings:

not really cravings. Things that make me feel better : lemon water, apples, protein (if I don't have to smell it cooking - but even that is getting better)

Gender prediction:

I go back and forth. I am thinking girl since I feel a LOT like I did with my pregnancy with Harper. However, I have nothing to compare a singleton boy pregnancy, so I really have no clue. Ha! I think boy b/c any dreams I've had have been of a boy. I know each pregnancy can be very different, so I have no idea really. We find out soon!

Labor Signs:

thank goodness no :) but Braxton Hicks have already started?!?

Belly Button in or out?

Wedding rings on or off?

Still on!

Milestones:

Not feeling/ wanting to die every day this week! I can tell my old self is coming back! :-) Woo Hoo!!

I will take a belly pic one of these days. I just tried and couldn't get the camera to cooperate, so I will try again later.

Guess What?!

2011-06-16T15:26:00.001-05:00

Yep! We're having another sweet baby!

Pic of Baby at 9 weeks

Baby is due mid-December, and today I am 13 weeks 4 days, which officially graduates me from trimester 1!! We are so very excited to welcome this little one into our family. I went to my midwife today and baby's heartbeat was 138bpm. If the old wives tale holds true, we might be adding another little boy to our gang! (hb < 140 = boy / hb > 140 = girl) Midwife told me that there are no statistics to this, just guesses. :-) I am praying for a healthy baby and mama!

After much thought, we are going to find out what this baby is. I did consider being surprised, but y'all, I cannot hold out! I am sooo ready to know who is hanging out in my belly! Plus, it really increases my bond with the baby. I can call the baby by name, pray for baby, and when labor day gets here, it really helps me mentally and emotionally during birth. We will share who will be joining our family in just about 5-6 weeks!! Yippee!!

I have to say I'm just now really getting excited about our 5th baby as the miscarriage caused me to be pretty guarded about this pregnancy. And, I've been sick as a dog. I have been terribly nauseated since 6 1/2 weeks. No food sounds good. I gag constantly. I have heartburn already. And I'm so tired, but still sturggle with insomnia sometimes. But, I'm also sooo happy. Isn't that crazy?! As Chris says, 'I don't remember you being this 'un fun' in your other pregnancies'....which made me laugh. He did follow up by saying that, ' we also didn't have 4 kids in your other pregnancies.' Speaking of Chris, he has been the most amazing husband in the world. He takes care of the 4 kids, cooks dinner, does laundry, goes grocery shopping, changes diapers, deals with whiners & biters (major issue with the boys right now), and takes care of me!!! He is so precious and I love him so much. He puts our family first and loves us and serves us. I could never write enough about how wonderful he is. (Baby, I'm coming back - slowly - but I'm coming back!!!) I will still have rough days of nausea that will wipe me out (uh, 2 days ago - terrible), but I'm also having good days inbetween! yay! I can't wait to serve my family again and just be mama - instead of sick mama!!

I'm also already in maternity clothes. I guess I have zero muscle tone in my stomach area after the boys and everything has already 'assumed position' in my tummy region. I seriously look 20 weeks pregnant (and yes I'm sure there is only one!) I dont have a belly pic, but will try to start taking some.

I just don't care for food really, but somehow have managed to gain 12 pounds already - holy moly! I know what it is from - red gatorade. It is the only beverage that makes me feel normal. And it's packed with calories and sugar. Now that I'm having better days, though, I'm waving bye bye to red gatorade and saying hello to water with tons of lemon juice. Harper now will even ask, Mama, does this water have lemons? Guess she's tried a few sips of my water & doesn't like it! Ha!

Well, I guess that is about all my updates for now. I have some older posts of weekly pregnancy surveys I've done along the way (just a few - not very consistent). I will post those, too, so I can keep up with this pregnancy.

Everyone else is doing great! The boys are almost 2 (next month!!) and are hilarious and so sweet. Harper is a little helper and big time talker. I will try to do some posts about them soon. They are awesome kids and I love being their mama!

Mama with Baby #5

10 Weeks

2011-05-22T15:44:00.000-05:00

I can't believe I'm 10 weeks! Last Monday, I had my first appointment. Chris went with me. I am actually going to a midwife this time. I want to do a VBAC, and am so blessed that I will be able to. I wanted Chris to meet her and of course see the ultrasound - which he didn't want to miss! I also needed the support as I was a tad bit nervous. The midwife was so nice and spent so much time with us. She went over my records and just gave me the feeling that I was the only person in her care. She didn't rush, talked with us for a while, then did my exam. Everything went very well. We had to go to a different division of Vanderbilt to get my ultrasound b/c the midwife doesn't do them in her office. Midwives see normal pregnancies that do not need special intervention, so they don't have the need for high tech equipment in their office - quite different from triplet high risk pregnancy!!

I was starving after appointment so I drove us to Burger King really quick after our appointment with the midwife and before our ultrasound appointment. :-) My nerves didn't really kick in until I was in the waiting room & I got so nervous. I just remembered how we were blindsided with the last miscarriage, so I guess I was trying to prepare myself not to see a heartbeat. The thought of that was just crushing, but I knew the Lord would sustain me. I just wanted an answer.

And, we got one soon enough! We saw our little bean right away and his or her heartbeat flickering at 170 bpm. We got some sweet pictures where baby looks like a little blob. But during the ultrasound we could see his/her little feet and hands just a movin'. It was precious.

I'm still feeling pretty yucky. Hungry/nauseous/weird tummy. Chris has been amazing with helping from diaper changes to food to laundry to caring for the kids. Evenings are hard I think because I am wiped out from the day, but we've made it to week 10!!!

How Far Along: 10 weeks

Total Weight Gain/Loss: 5 lbs - what?!? I got on the scale this morning and about fell off. The only thing that helps calm my nausea is red gatorade & small handfuls of food. Oh well. Hoping it will even out as I enter the 2nd trimester!

Maternity Clothes: Well, I hate pants or anything on my waist right now. I wear dresses all the time.

Gender: ??

Movement: Not yet!

What I miss: Everything not stinking. Seriously, I think everything stinks...the air conditioning, the carpet, the dish towels, certain foods, my children (well, sometimes). So many things' smells have changed and make me nauseous. I make Chris smell things & he will say they smell like nothing. I completely disagree!

Sleep: It's good, but weird. I really need a nap during the day, but if I take one I have terrible insomnia from about 3-5 AM. That, in turn, makes for a terrible day. So, I've been trying to stay awake during naptime, or take a really short one - 30 minutes. But, that makes for a rough evening. Needless to say, Chris and I will both be really glad when this 1st trimester is over.

Symptoms: Nauseous all the live long day. Oh its hard. But, I'm also thankful for feeling this way as its my indication little bean is okay in there and is continuing to grow.

Cravings: Baked potatoes, fruit. I know I have to eat protein but it isn't appealing at all. Once I can get a little bit down, I immediately start to feel better, but nothing ever sounds good.

Best Moment this week: Drinking a cup of coffee to help with other symptoms. Having a morning of feeling normal (can't help but say it freaked me out a little bit, but looking back I know its just my hormones starting to level out - yay!!)

What we are looking forward to: Traveling to Amish Country with my mom and sister next week! And finishing the 1st trimester - 2 weeks baby!!

Other Randoms:
- I look like I'm 5 months pregnant. My belly was super stretched out with the boys so it is remembering how it used to be, I guess. When I was 6 weeks, I went home to see my mom & sister. We watched the Royal wedding. In the airport I had a lady ask me if I was pregnant to which I said yes. She then said 'Not much longer!?' I said, well, I've got a little ways to go :-) Then I walked away fast. Not so much for my embarrassment, but for hers! I always feel like I need to explain,' well, I had triplets, so my muscles are all stretched out, and that is why I look like I'm about to give birth, but my baby is only the size of a sesame seed.' Lol. No one wants to hear that!

- We told Harper last week that Mommy had a baby in her tummy. Well, actually, we were going to wait until I was out of the 1st trimester to tell her, but she saw a picture of the ultrasound and asked, "Mommy, is that a picture of a baby in your tummy?!" WHAT?!? I was stunned. Had she heard me talking? How did she know? I called Chris in, and we just went ahead and told her. She told us that she had a baby in her tummy and it would be here on Saturday. Lol. She hasn't mentioned anything since.

- I haven't been to church in forever & I can't wait to go back. We started taking the kids again after cold & flu season ended. We had gone 3 weeks & they were just getting used to things again when I started getting sick. Because I have to get all of them ready by myself on Sunday, I just haven't been able to do it. BBC, we will be back again - some day.

7 Weeks

2011-05-01T18:21:00.003-05:00

Right now I am laying in my bed while Chris feeds all the kiddos downstairs. I feel terrible...very tired and nauseous. Have felt that way all day. My nausea started around 6 weeks 4 days, and has slowly been ramping up.

I am very thankful for feeling this way, too, because I know my hormones are having a heyday - just as they should be. I never got to feeling *this* sick with my miscarriage, so I'm hoping that all is well in my belly.

Harper just came in to tell me it is dinner time. I guess I will go downstairs and see if I can stomach anything?! Yuck.

Two Times In Our Day

2011-04-29T08:00:00.000-05:00

10:24 A.M.- Trouble

6:12 P.M. - Dinner

What do you do at these times? :-)

Wordless Wednesday: Impromptu Photo Shoot

2011-04-27T08:00:00.001-05:00

Bath Time!

2011-04-25T13:15:00.000-05:00

A little video of the boys' bath time.

One of the more enjoyable moments.

I'm singing like a goofball - anything for a laugh!

I think a funnier video would be one of me acting so ridiculous! :-)

(ain't gonna happen though)

Bath time started to get much easier/ manageable when we started giving the boys a bath EVERY (well, most every) night per doctor's orders (for their eczema not because we weren't bathing them. ha!)

It used to consist of lots and lots of screaming and tears -

guess they've gotten used to it.

After bath, while they are still drippy-wet, we slather them in vaseline.

Then jammy them up.

Their skin has gotten sooo much better!!!

Who knew it was that ~~easy~~ hard (X's 3)?!

MAJOR workout!!

Letters

2011-04-22T11:00:00.001-05:00

Have y'all ever seen this blog? I think it is great. Anyway, I have a couple of letters I'd like to write...

Dear Chris Tomlin,
Thank you so much for your CD Hello Love. It created the most Holy time right in my kitchen while I was stirring maccaroni noodles. I even had to stop, get on my knees to worship The Most High God. Even more precious, when I opened my eyes my children were copying me...hands raised, praising Jesus. Thank you.
Your sister in Christ,
Mary Lindsey

Dear Beth Hoffman,
Your book, Saving CeCe Honeycutt, has become one of my favorite books. I am so glad you decided to quit the path of life you were on to write a book. This book brought so much joy and color to my day I was so sad to see it end. I hope there is a sequel and that it doesn't take 4 years to write like your last book did. Maybe you are on a roll now? I hope.
Faithful reader,
Mary Lindsey

Dear Blue Stocking Ladies (my awesome bookclub),
I cheated and read the book I mentioned in my previous letter (see above) and have not read A Tale of Two Cities. I am so sorry. A story about Savannah, GA just appealed to me so much more than Dickens. I might still try to challenge myself and read it. We'll see. So far I've got a good pattern going...attend one month, miss a month. Won't be missing June, though... Water for Elephants!
Still LOVE you though,
ML

Dear Mom, Nancy, Toos, Nean, and Vicki,
In one week I will be at your house, Vicki, and we will be recovering from watching Will & Kate's wedding at 4AM. I am sooo excited! The wedding will be fun, but the company of you precious women will be even better.
Love,
Sissy

Going to rest my eyes before the children wake up.

Love~

2:52 Update

2011-04-21T08:00:00.003-05:00

'And Jesus grew in wisdom and stature, and in favor with God and man.' - Luke 2:52

I can remember several Bible studies, sermons, and teachings on this verse relating it to all the areas of life that Jesus matured in, and how we need to focus on all areas of our life - not just one.

wisdom - mental

stature - physical

favor with God - spiritual

favor with man - emotional

(terribly brief description of wonderful teachings, but it makes the point for this post.)

I was thinking on this when I was doing laundry, and I though to myself
'why don't I update this blog on how we grew/what we did in these areas daily (as possible)?'

So...here goes the first post with our 2:52 Updates.

Feel free to copy and do your own!

It really helped streamline my thoughts!

PHYSICAL

Cleaning was my workout today.

I cleaned bathrooms and discovered the genius idea of mopping our bathroom floors with old socks. It cleaned them up so great! I put them on my hands like mittens after I dampened them, sprayed a fine mist of cleaner and mopped it up.


My Favorite Cleaner in the World!!!

photo credit

I also folded about 4 loads of laundry - great workout for my arms!

photo credit

EMOTIONAL

Kissed the cheeks of my sweet boys a million times today while knowing in the back of my head their sweet cheeks won't be around forever to kiss. They still have such sweet, round baby cheeks. Sweeter than peaches. Just yumminess!

Maverick and his sweet cheeks (kind of googly eyed in the pic - lol)

Held Harper's head in my lap, stroked her hair, covered her eyes with a warm cloth and sang to her while being nurse mommy to her pink eye.

Look forward to time with Chris tonight. Finishing up this blog to go spend time with him.

MENTAL

Reading this about the Amish

Amish Peace

I'm prepping for my Mom's birthday trip at the end of May. My mom, sister, and I will be traveling to Pennsylvania to visit Amish country! While we are there we are going to stay at a beautiful, Victorian bed and breakfast, ride in horse and buggies, eat with two REAL Amish families, and drive through the countryside. Can't wait for the cool life experience, but also for time

with two of my favorite people!

SPIRITUAL

Jesus has really been challeging me to trust Him with everything.
All of it.
None of it is in my hands.

Have been challenged to pray out loud over my children.
It helps me concentrate if I place my hands on
Harper's head when I pray for her,
Warner's head when I pray for him,
Crews' head when I pray for him, and
Maverick's head when I pray for him.
I sometimes do this when they are watching TV.

Way Back 'Whens'day: 'Multiple' Roommates

2011-04-20T14:14:00.002-05:00

I saw this idea over on Rachael's blog, and since I've been cleaning out photos on our computer, I ran across these. Here are my roommates from Liberty my Senior year.

Me, Kristin, Brooke

I moved off campus the summer Chris and I got engaged. I took 2 summer classes so I could have just one class to complete my spring semester when I was swimming in wedding plans. Brooke got engaged a month before me, and Kristin had started dating the guy she would eventually marry.

Our first home to decorate for Christmas

Snow Day at LU

Want to know a weird fact about us?

Brooke is a triplet (2 girls and a boy). She has older brothers who are twins...her mom is my hero! Was then and DEFINITELY is now!

Kristen was the first of us to have a baby...make that babies. She had twin boys!!!

And well, you know about me...

Who would of thought we were such 'multiple' friends :-)

Welcome Back to Me!

2011-04-19T14:44:00.000-05:00

Hey There!

We are just now surfacing after a month of sickness in our house. Stomach virus for 2 weeks, colds, strep throat, high fevers, pink eye. I didn't want to blog for fear you would catch it. But I am back!

{wrote this Sunday afternoon, computer died and I lost all the pics I uploaded. Was going to re-load pics and post yesterday, but then Crews threw up. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!?! Thankfully, after a rough morning, lots of prayers and popsicles...he is fine. So is everyone else.}

Quick catch up...
The month of January was filled with lots of fun snow days. However, we only took the kids out once, maybe twice. I felt like such a snow-scrooge, but dressing 4 little ones in multiple layers was so difficult. The first one dressed would be roasting by the time the 3rd one was almost done. Once we finally made it outside, everyone was happy for about 3 minutes, then a glove would fall off. Or someone would face plant into the snow. It was the equivalent of about 18 workout in 30 minutes. Thankfully, Chris and I laughed about it until we brought them inside and the volume from their ~~crying~~ shrieking was so loud we thought the windows would break. We then declared it was naptime. Here are some pics from our fun.

Crews

Maverick not having any of it.

Warner enjoying the snow!

Maverick decided to taste the bird feeder Harper made.

The way Chris and I felt. HA!

I don't remember February at all. Proof to myself this is WHY I BLOG! Oh, I do remember that Harper turned 3. Yay! We had a 'Pink Party.' Pink Lemonade, pink cupcakes that everyone decorated, pink balloons, pink nail polish, oh and per request of the birthday girl... everyone had to wear pink! It was lots of fun. No pics for the blog right now (Aunt Nancy couldn't make it, so it was just me and the camera. Needless to say, I took about 4 pics. So sad. I was incredibly overwhelmed by the way the boys FREAKED OUT when everyone came to our house. Crews threw up he was so upset. Warner wouldn't eat because he was crying so hard. And Maverick, well, he just loved everyone). Just envision lots of pink and a happy little Harper girlie! Note to self: Aunt Nancy CANNOT miss next year! We will plan the party around her schedule. :-)

March....Month of sickness. You do not want details.

Back to April...
Beautiful month of spring!

Chris and I circa 2003 - a year before we were married. Oh my hair!

Chris and I celebrated our 7 year anniversary this past Friday (real Anni was on Sunday) by eating at Cracker Barrel - where our first date took place at Liberty. We then went to the mall to do some shopping, but the power went out - at the mall!!- due to all the bad storms. So, we went to Sweet CeCe's (yummy yogurt with any topping! We shared birthday cake yogurt with fresh strawberries and reese's cups.) Deep thanks to the Strothers for taking on our gang!! We try to trade up babysitting with them every month - it's only worked out twice. ha! They have 4 kids and we have 4 kids, so it works out great!

We went to church today (Sunday), and I forgot how much energy it takes to get 4 kids ready to go to church by myself (since Chris has to go in early.) Sheesh. 3 1/2 hours to be exact. And that was with no breaks. But we made it AND I was on time. The favor of the Lord must have been upon me.

Going to work on loading up some pics tonight to have some grand blogging material!

It's good to be back~

The Inevitable

2011-02-28T16:50:00.000-06:00

Well, the inevitable has happened...the kids got the stomach flu - all at the same time. We just woke up from a nap, and I am enjoying the quiet while sipping a London Fog. It is really rainy outside & a perfect day for sleepies.

The boys slept in until 8:15 - which is NOT normal. I went in to check on them and was about knocked out by the stench. Two boys had thrown up in their cribs and all 3 had very yucky diapers. They were miserable. Thankfully, we got them all cleaned up and changed in time to start changing them again. I think we changed around 25 diapers before 1pm. Their little bottoms were so raw. Naps went well, and everyone is just waking up.

Harper is snuggling with me on the couch, and she has a fever and runny nose. I best be signing off to help be nurse mommy.

Please pray for protection over Chris and I - that this bug will pass us by. Chris has a retreat he would really like to be a part of this Friday - Sunday. He has missed it the last 2 years - due to babies and sickness. If either one of us come down with it, the chances of him going are slim to none (all of our babysitters/ anyone that can keep them are invovled with this retreat). Thank you so much - I know that you prayers can move mountains! :-)

Love & Lysol,

My 3 Year Old Sunshine

2011-02-13T18:35:00.003-06:00

You are my sunshine

My only (girlie) sunshine

You make me happy,

when skies are gray,

You'll never know, dear

How much I love you

Please don't take my sunshine away.

Happy Birthday, Sunshine Girl!

We are so blessed to have you in our lives.

You were chosen to be

our daughter

and

triplet brothers' big sister.

There couldn't be anybody more perfect than you.

We enjoy you now,

and look forward to seeing God's plans He has for your life.

We love you with every bit of our being.

Love,

Mommy, Daddy

Warner, Crews, & Maverick

her birth story.

December 2010

2011-02-10T14:40:00.001-06:00

Thank you all for reading through my previous post. I feel that was a giant healing step for me in this process. I am going to see if I can remember the rest of our December.

Harper and I decorated our mini Christmas tree at the beginning of December. Each ornament I pulled out, she would just squeal and clap over! It was sooo fun decorating with her. Children do bring so much wonder and awe to life. (She is dressed like it is 80 degrees outside because she just likes about 3 pieces of clothing right now. This dragonfly tank top, her 'sweetie' shirt (seen in the movie below), and heart shorts. She wears them every single day. I have to wash them at night so they are ready to go first thing in the morning. Thankfully, she doesn't wear them to preschool) We kept our tree on our table. I thought through all of my options about tree placement (even the classic pack n play), but thought on top of our kitchen table would be best. And it was! (We have just started eating together at the table. The boys were in high chairs, Harps at the table, and Chris and I eating when we could! Ha!)

So, from December 11-18, my mom was in town for Christmas. I honestly can't remember what we did. I do remember we went to look at Christmas lights one night and then had an impromptu open all our gifts. It was so funny because everyone was quite content upstairs, so we just brought all the gifts upstairs and opened them in the hallway. We kept laughing because it wasn't very 'Christmas-y.' The kids tore into the presents, enjoyed the wrapping paper, played with the gifts a little bit, and went on about their business. And that was that - hah! I sure am thankful I have wonderful & flexible parents & in-laws... no one is hung up on how things 'should be,' and everyone goes with the flow.

Here are some pics from that fun Christmas memory:

Oh, funny story. So mom got one of the boys this sesame street pop up toy. ALL THREE wanted to play with it. There were knock down (should I say 'bite down') drag out fights over it! So, the next day she went to Toys R Us and bought 2 more to bring peace. They all 3 play with their own toy at the same time. The noise level is close to that of a spaceship blast off (but, at least there is peace):

Jo and Randy came to see us that Saturday, and stayed through Wednesday. It was a pretty relaxed visit, and Chris and I got to go out to do some shopping and spend time together. We had a 2nd crazy Christmas with them right before nap time. so I think they got to experience about the same amount of gratitude from our tots as Grandma Dee Dee did. :-) But, Chris and I were/are extremely grateful for all the new & fun gifts! (I wasn't feeling well at this point, and completely forgot the camera)

Christmas Eve and Christmas morning were so quiet and peaceful (as quiet as they could be). We had such a wonderful time getting the gifts ready, as well as attempting to read about Jesus' birth for the 2nd year to toddlers (not successful. Harper kind of listened).

I really look forward to next year when we take all of them to church on Christmas Eve. Our church doesn't offer childcare so the entire family can be together. (I really like this idea!) No one expects complete silence at the service since there are small children...but could you imagine what would have happened if we had taken three 17 month old babies?! Yikes! I stayed home with all of them while Chris went to church.

Christmas morning was so fun, and as many of you, we woke to a snowy morning! I have only had one other white Christmas, and it was seriously the BEST Christmas ever (with sledding, hot chocolate, snow cream and endless cartoon watching with my aunt). Oh, and I was seven(ish)...no worries in the world! Anyway, this Christmas was sooo much better than last Christmas ( I know that sounds horrible, but last Christmas was survival. All of our helpers & extended family were with their families, and the babies were only 5 months old & still very needy. Chris and I managed, but it was a looooong day last year. But, this year was great! Here are some videos of our Christmas Eve, wake up & Christmas morning! (This is my first movie. It's a bit long & kind of shaky. You also have to turn your head to the side about 3/4 way through. Have I convinced you to watch it?! Ha! Hang with me...if you can watch it for that long! I am NO Spielberg, but I think I captured what I wanted to capture :))

We enjoyed eating doughnuts and an egg & sausage bake (that 2 of the 3 boys puked up - we hadn't yet found out they all are allergic to eggs - awesome!). Chris took Harper outside in the freezing cold so she could try out her new bike. They both came back in with snowflakes in their hair. The rest of the day was filled with lunch, naps, playing, etc.

By, the next day, I was ready to get the house back in shape. Since I had Chris home for a bit, I was able to do that and enjoy some other little projects that I had been wanting to do. That was such a gift of love to me!

My new year started out with a rejuvenation of my heart. I am in love with my husband and children more than ever. I am in love with Jesus and loving to learn what His word says. I am content with what He has blessed me with - the wonderful and the challenges. And, I am wanting to stay grateful always. I wonder what He has for our family. I want to be obedient to His calling.

Okay...we have January 2011, which was filled with snow! And then I should be caught up! Yay!

Selah

2011-02-07T15:53:00.002-06:00

Warning: Long post... emotional & 'girl stuff' discussed. Just a warning. :-) Also, I really debated on sharing this via blog, but I thought that it might be able to help someone. I felt so helpless, however, all of my sweet friends who shared so openly and honestly with me were a God-send! I've decided to close the comments, as this is very dear to my heart. I know that all (10 of you -ha!) who read my blog offer your condolences to our family, and I thank you from the bottom of my heart. I just want to protect my heart and the tenderness that comes with this from any comments that might hurt more (even though people mean their best).

Our November was filled with lots of family and love, as well as, receiving some exciting and shocking news. We found out we were going to be adding a new little one to our family! I took a pregnancy test November 9th (on a hunch that I might be pregnant), and that little line darkened declaring our family would be growing again! It was definitely a sweet blessing from the Lord because at the time we were actually not trying but 'preventing.' I started all the lovely pregnancy symptoms over Thanksgiving week.

However, we had a sad turning point in our December. I had my 1st appointment on December 10th at 8 weeks. Well, we went in and had an ultrasound done, and the baby's heartbeat (just one baby) couldn't be found. The baby was measuring at 6 weeks and 2 days when it should have been measuring at 8 weeks. The weird thing is, everything else was measuring at 8 weeks, and I was still feeling sick and yucky.

My body hadn't started to do anything to release the baby- no spotting or cramping at all. We waited through the weekend, and then called on Tuesday. I had the option to do a D&C since it had already been almost 3 weeks since the baby had passed away and my body wasn't doing what it should. I talked to some sweet friends who had let the miscarriage happen naturally and some who had gone with a D&C. I opted for a D&C for several reasons:

1. My mom was in town. She had already planned to come to celebrate an early Christmas. When you have surgery, you want your mom near!

2. I couldn't think of going through a natural miscarriage if it was just me at home with the kids. The Dr. said it could take anywhere from a few days to months for my body to figure out the baby hadn't progressed.

3. My mom and aunt both had miscarriages, but STILL had to have a d&c because their bodies didn't get rid of everything.

4. This is more of a practical one, but it did play a part in our decision making: finances. Our insurance deductible had already been met for the year. A surgery that could have cost over $5000 only cost us $250. If I had waited, I still might have had to have a d&c in January, and paid a TON for it.

5. I had already had one before, so I knew a little of what to expect. (It wasn't for a miscarriage, but for polyps in my uterus...the reason I couldn't get pregnant to begin with)

The day we found out our little one didn't have a heartbeat was one of the hardest days I've walked through. I was shocked by the amount of grief I went through. I cried and cried and cried. I remember taking a bath, and getting the water as hot as I could stand it - maybe to counter some of the pain my heart was dealing with. I just wept in the bathtub. It was the worst bath of my life. I was so thankful Chris was off of work that day, and my mom was on her way because I needed to grieve. I was shocked at how much I loved this little baby, even though he/she was such a surprise to us. A mother's love runs so very deep...you don't have to 'think it up' or wish it to be, it is already there - in the heart, the marrow.

One of the silly reasons I thought about not sharing this so publicly, was because I thought others wouldn't understand why I was so pained since I already had children. Even though the Lord has graciously blessed us with children, I was grieving for this 5th child that I had already come to know and love. I had written his/her due date (July 23rd - a week after the boy's 2nd birthday) in my calendar, as well as all the weeks of the pregnancy...waiting to check another one off. I understand that this grief may not be the same kind of grief, cutting as deep, if this was my first pregnancy or subsequent miscarriage, but it was still grief.

The day we found out, I would get sweet kisses and hugs from Harper, Warner, Crews, and Maverick and was so thankful for the blessing of these four. I would do what they needed me to do : diapers, meals, hugs, snacks, etc...and then go upstairs to cry. That night, I let out some really good sobs in my bedroom. Sobbing is very healing. Harper must have heard me because Chris carried her into the room to check on me. She crawled up in the bed with me and got under the covers. She put her little hand on my face and looked deep into my red, swollen eyes.
She asked, "Mommy, are you crying?

I said "yes." She asked why and I told her I was sad. (We hadn't told her about the baby yet). I told her it was okay for mommys to be sad sometime.

She said "yeah, I get sad sometimes."

And I told her I know.

Then she reached over and hugged me around my neck with her little arm...her sweet scent was healing to my heart. She said, It's okay, Harpers here, and the patted my wet cheek. Then, she grabbed my hand and said, "Here suck your thumb."

Chris and I died laughing, and just like Steel Magnolias says,"Laughter through tears is the best medicine!" So true! Out of the mouths of babes.

The next morning I woke up and felt empty and weird. The baby was still inside me, but with Jesus. I knew the only thing that would make me feel better was spending time with my Savior Jesus, the one who gives and takes away. I spent a long time that morning reading the Word and seeking Him. I wrote out a praise list of all the ways we have seen His hand in this. Yes, He allowed this little one to be conceived and not born for only reasons that He knows. It is easy to sometimes look at God as though He was cruel to take this from us, but I know that God is good and not a cruel God, so I asked Him to show Himself to me...show me where He was... and these are some ways that He did...

- I was able to see the Dr so early. The last two times I've been pregnant, the Dr wouldn't see me until 10/11 weeks. This time, she scheduled me as early as she would see me - 8 weeks. If I hadn't seen her this early, I may have had to go through this at home, with out any help (I'm sure God would have provided for me in that situation, too, though)

-When I went to the Dr. they called us back to meet with the financial people first. We thought it was very weird. We didn't have any history of bad credit or not paying the hospital (praise the Lord!), so I don't know why they did this first. However, due to some insurance changes that went into effect in 2011, we realized we would have to pay $300 per visit plus the delivery cost. We also had counted up that we needed a new car with a 5th baby! We had just worked so hard to get out of debt, that we were a little overwhelmed while waiting to see the Dr. We prayed for the Lord to provide for all of our needs, that we were trusting Him in it all.

-I had the option to have a D&C. Sometimes that is not even offered, and you just have to wait. (I really struggled with this decision on waiting vs. surgery, but was so glad with my decision in the end. It was not traumatic at all, and I felt very taken care of... more on that to come.)

-My Mom was here. Enough said.

- Just the fact that the appointment was on a Friday, when Chris was off. He was there to hold my hand, and let me cry. He was sad, too. He cared so great for our kids so I could grieve as I needed. He even got up with Harper, as she had a poop accident in the middle of the night (constipation issues). He cleaned it up and put her back to sleep - without me even waking up!!!! He got up with the kids the morning I originally wrote this list out & fixed them pancakes so I could spend time with Jesus. Oh, and he brought me coffee in bed!!! He is so precious to me.

I wrote this in my journal:
Thank you for walking us through this difficult time. Thank you for preparing the way ahead of us. Thank you for the amazing friends and family that you surrounded us with, Jesus. You are so good and your love does endure forever. In time, YOUR time, you will show us the plan you have for our family. Thank you, my LORD, for guiding us. Give us strength today and help us to enjoy one another.

I'm sure you've heard of Jesus Calling devotional, and just for my records,I wanted to record these days that spoke so vividly to me : December 11th, 12th, 14th, 16th, 17th, 18th, 21st - they felt like they were written just for me at that time - maybe it was because I was extrememly tender, vulnerable to the Lord and what He was up to, but God's word and my time with Him was gentle, healing, comforting. I know Satan so badly wanted me to doubt God / be angry with him - I'm so glad there was a different option that I had to choose!! One filled with hope, joy and peace!

After spending that time with Jesus, I was at peace, and I was able to see His hand in this over the next few days. Our precious friends offering to bring us dinner that night. Cards and flowers from friends and family arrived letting us know their hurt for us.

I had surgery on December 17th (after a follow up ultrasound on the 16th to make sure there wasn't a heartbeat & our dates were just 'off'. There wasn't). The whole experience was very peaceful. The staff kept telling me how sorry they were for our loss. Chris went with me and it was a nice time to be alone together. We were able to talk some and just hold hands in the quiet. We prayed together, and truly were at peace. After my surgery was over, I was pretty sedated, so we had to wait until that wore off. We went home that night, and I slept hard. I was a little dizzy throughout the night and felt off the next day, but I had some good sleep.

Chris' family came into to town the next day, since my mom had to leave. They took wonderful care of the kids. Chris was also off of work for the next 2 weeks, so I was able to rest and recuperate. I spent a lot of time in the bed or on the couch as I just didn't feel good. I was told not to pick up the kids for a week, and was able to do that because of the wonderful help I had!! I savored the kisses and cuddles I received from Harper, Warner, Crews, and Maverick. They were a balm to my heart.

Tuesday Chris' parents left. I'm not sure if it was just because I had finally been alone or if my hormones were to the point where my body could release everything, but I started what I describe as the worst period with terrible PMS on Wednesday. I stayed in bed crying, weeping, and bleeding that day. I think my body was just releasing everything as my hormones regulated. (the dr. said it would be a few days after my surgery before my body figured out I wasn't pregnant anymore, and would adjust). I went through that for about 2 days. I felt helpless and frustrated that I couldn't do what I wanted to with the children. I wanted that little baby back that I had lost. I wanted to drown out my sadness with my regular routine. However, I was just sad and didn't feel good. Chris, the patient man that he is, just stayed by my side, helped me with the kids, told me that I would be back to myself again, and to give my body some time. It was about a week before I felt like my hormones had leveled out, and 2-3 weeks before I stopped bleeding (normal - much like after you deliver a baby)

I did my best to seek the Lord during that time. I really wanted a name for this baby, and anything that Chris and I spoke about just never settled...just felt like a 'name.' While I was reading the Psalms one night, I came across 'Selah.' I remember studying about it when I was at Liberty, and if I remember correctly, the meaning was never really given but guessed upon. I did some researched and found that it was a musical term...one that meant to give breath, take a break or pause, or reflect on what was just read/sung. Oh that resonated deep in my soul. This baby is exactly that to me. Selah. A reflection. A pause in my life.

Since our sweet miracle boys have been born in July 2009, I have not stopped but for moments here and there. I haven't truly reflected upon what the LORD had given us, what miracle HE had performed! While I was going through their pregnancy and birth, I knew it was a miracle. When I held them and gazed at their tiny little perfectly formed bodies, I knew it was a miracle, but I hadn't reflected upon it in quite a while. We have been in survival mode for a good while now. I would still do my quiet time (reading God's Word), and would trust that the Lord is gently leading me, but I hadn't recounted His goodness to me in a while. This sweet baby, Selah, gave that to me...a time of rest, a choice of looking at something terrible and choosing to be grateful instead of bitter. This sweet one gave me the gift of loving my four children more and more. A wake-up call of sorts. I have been able to look at the boys as individual people instead of just 'the triplets.' It may sound funny to you, who have had one baby at a time, but because there is so much to do and survive in that first year of triplets, it was hard to individually bond with each child. I did what I could, but have realized it just takes time. I am learning their little personalities now, their cries in the night (or day, for that matter), their different laughs, and how they are communicating with me. I've been able to see this all along, however, now all of this is deep in my heart, running through my veins. It just took some time to see it, to pay attention to it, and my sweet Selah, you gave me (and your brothers and sister) that gift. I so wish I could have held you in my arms, little one. I do wish that you were still growing inside, tucked away safe and sound. You are safe in Jesus' arms now, and I look foward to the day I will meet you.

God, you are so gracious to us. Thank you for showing me all that you did from what seemed to be such a devastating experience.

Selah Blanton

October 2010 - December 2010

Praying for all of you who have had a miscarriage(s), are struggling with infertility...may you see the hand of God. He hears and hasn't abandoned you.

Catching Up - November 2010

2011-01-27T16:27:00.000-06:00

Hey There! Yoohoooo....it's me. The keeper of this bloggy. I am here, just living life more than writing about it. I wish I could just strap a video camera/blog updater to my head like in those Xtreme sports and document my life. Moments like this would be captured:

My morning started off yesterday by prying about 20 matches out of each of the boys' hands all the while scrambling around on my hands and knees picking up about 400 off of the floor. I had Harper helping me pick them up while I was fishing them out of the boys' mouths. Harper kept me calm saying, 'Those silly boys...trying to eat matches!' In my mind I'm freaking out, I'm sweating, trying to keep calm, but feeling out of control...her little voice brought it back to a lite level and actually made it funny. I got all 475 (we've used maybe 25 matches) off the ground and out of the boys' mouths. None were ingested... praise the Lord! And you may be thinking where was I during the whole scattering of the matches...in the living room tying Harper's shoes (our living room and kitchen are connected!). Those little guys are quick and they work together. This will be much effective one day. Just right now, it is causing my blood pressure to spike and me not to blog (and do many other things).

However, the little angels are all sleeping right now, there is a ton of snow on the ground, and I should be working out (great motivation for sitting still and blogging). I am so ridiculously sore after doing my workout video yesterday, that the thought of doing a squat is complete torture. So, here I sit blogging (and eating 2 cinnamon raisin cookies that I made this morning! Delish!)

There is so much I have to update on since my last post. Let's see..

It was October 2010 when we left off... the boys' had started walking, and they have swiftly moved into running. They are such cute little guys and are true toddlers now. They turned 18 months on January 16th (side note confession: I sometimes forget their birthday! I want to record July 20 as their birthday because that was the first day my Dr. told me that they would be born. Then, she said we could move it up due to something (positive) that I can't remember...so that was the date (originally) that was written on my heart. Let's just hope I don't write the wrong date on something that is important! lol) I'm pretty sure they all weigh more than Harper now. Crews and Harper might be close in weight, but we'll see. They go to the Dr on the 20th &21th (separate appointments now...cannot imagine taking three boys to the Dr at the same time now! *shudder*) update: here are their stats from the Dr - I can remember their percentages, not the actual weight or height!
Warner: 80% weight & 97% height
Crews: 75% weight & 97% height
Maverick: 85% weight & off the chart for height - ha! ha1

Harper is doing well. Loves 'pretty school' (as she still calls it). She has been such a little helper lately. We had a blast making cookies, and decorating gingerbread houses, coloring and enjoying our white Christmas! But more of that later...

Our Thanksgiving festivities started out the 17th of November when Dad, Leslie, Ryan, Reba, Nancy and Will all came to visit! While we didn't eat any turkey, we had a great time playing some made up indoor version of volleyball and hot potato, shopping in Franklin, and eating. It was great to see them and spend time with them! I can't believe I didn't take any pics of their time here!

D, L, R&R left on Friday, and my Mom flew in Saturday to do a mini-thanksgiving with us & Nancy and Will. N & W were here for a youth pastor's conference, so they were gone during the day, but had time to sneak in some snuggles.

(Uh, yes, Harper still has a paci. We are slowly detoxing. Will soon pull the plug (literally) at night too) We had a great time together hanging out. It is always such a blessing for me whenever we have family come to visit as I have sooo many extra sets of helping hands! I was able to do so many other little projects since family was taking care of the little tots. Monday, we had our mini-Thanksgiving that turned into quite a feast. So yummy! We cooked all morning, taking turns in the kitchen. The meal was all ready around 2, and we all the adults got to eat in peace b/c it was smack in the the middle of naptime! So great! We fixed all the littles a plate when they woke up. Family and good food are such blessings. Mom, Nancy, and Will flew out Tuesday morning.

After dinner, we attempted to have a photo shoot with the kids. Not such a great idea - as it was similar to letting cows out of the barn. All 4 ran in different directions!! Good thing we had 5 adults to chase! It was like they had been freed for the first time. Oh wait, it was the FIRST time! They can all walk now!

Thanksgiving was fun as we went to GA for a few days. We drove through the night on Tuesday & arrived at 2am Wednesday morning. Driving through the night did not help the screaming children at all. The good news was that we could put them to bed right away & not deal with crankiness until bedtime. Honestly, the car was a very small and very loud place to be at times, but we survived. Portable DVD players are awesome! We drove Tuesday night, recuperated Wednesday, then drove 2 1/2 more hours on Thursday to Alabama for Thanksgiving. We had a great time with family - saw Chris' grandfather (little ones great grandfather!), extended family, ate yummy food, and let the kids play in the yard a while. We left around 5:30pm and it was the only silent trip we had b/c the kids slept the whole way home since they didn't have naps! It took me back to the days when Chris and I were first married and it was only us in the car. It was weird and memory evoking. Friday, we recuperated from Thanksgiving & went to visit some dear friends that night. Saturday we had a mini-reunion with dear friends at church. Jo opened her home to all these sweet people, and it was wonderful to see so many faces that we love! No one had met the boys yet, so while very over-stimulating to the boys, we had a great time! (During the fun, Warner ended up busting his eye/cheek on a chair and breaking out in hives due to antibiotics. Poor little buddy is one tough cookie.) We all took naps after that and then drove back to TN that night. Last hour in the car, all 4 kids screamed & cried. I almost cried when I saw our house! Yet, we survived and have great memories and stories to tell from it! ( I took no pictures in GA. I forgot my camera)

Here are some pics of what we are up to these days...

sunglasses that make us look like the three blind mice.

~~eating~~ drinking yogurt even though we know perfectly well how to use a spoon.

It's the small things, really.

Next up...December. I should have that up by May. I kid, I kid.

Love,
ML

October 2010

2010-11-09T10:47:00.000-06:00

Hellleeeww!!! How has your October been? Ours was just fab!

Let me see if I can recap it. Pictures must wait, though. Chris and I are trying to figure out storage of all of our pictures. How do yall do it? Here is what we are thinking...

1. Put most of the pics we have on our computer onto our external hard drive, as well as Picasa online.

2. Then delete them off our our Mac to make room for all the other ones (i have about 600 fun memories on my camera as we ~~speak,~~ type/read)!

3. Try to keep this up anytime I download pics onto our computer. I just hate to think all of our pics would be lost. Our "puter" is gettin' old (well, it's 5 years old) and the thought of it crashing has crossed my mind a lot!

Onto the month of October...
The month started off with our birthday celebrations! Chris turned 30 and I turned 29! My b-day was pretty low-key. My mom was in town and she took me shopping at Anthropologie and then we went to Whole Foods to get my mini- birthday carrot cake - yumm!!! Chris turned 30, five days after me. Our sweet friend, Arica kept the kids for us that night. We went out to a yummy restaurant - The Post and Beam - a farmhouse built in the 1800's converted into a culinary delight. Then we got a hotel room for the night. It was so nice to not be woken up during the night AND to be able to sleep in and have a yummy breakfast (that I didn't cook or clean up!!)

The next weekend, Chris, Harper, and I flew to Raleigh, NC to see Dave Ramsey LIVE with my mom, Nancy, Will, Johnny, and Meghan! Mom had gotten us these tickets as early Christmas presents. If you read my sister's blog, you know that she and Will are HUGE Dave Ramsey fans! They have rocked the baby steps' socks off over the last 3 years. I honestly would applaud them on the side, but think there would be NO WAY we could do this due to our family's rapid growth. I always thought it was a cool concept, but didn't know how we would do it! Well, after this awesome day with family, we learned SOOOO much, and have now gotten on the baby steps train! Which led to the craziness of the next few weeks. Go HERE to read about the baby steps.

Harper, stayed with Dad & Leslie, Ryan and Reba while we were at the event. She had a blast playing with them and her cousins, Kyler and Niko!! Chris and I flew home on Sunday morning, and Harps stayed with mom and Nancy over the next week. While she was away, I had 4 1/2 days with just the boys. And since they were still taking 2 naps a day (they just dropped that precious morning nap), I had two, 4 hour periods of hard work getting ready for our garage sale. When we went to the Dave Ramsey event, we went with a little debt- but it is still debt! (side note: One couple that was there had paid off a RIDICULOUS amount of money ($600,000)!!Dave's baby steps work!!) So, when we got home, we were very motivated and got a crackin'! We put stuff on craigslist, and then had a ginormous yard sale last weekend! And guess what??!?! Just with that intense 'gazelle' (Dave Ramsey peeps will get that term) focus,

WEEEE'RRRRREEEE DEEEEEEBBBBBTTTTT FFFFFRRRRREEEEEE!!!!

Once we actually get the last debt paid (we have the money, just haven't handed it over yet), I think we are going to call the show!! Listen in for us! :-) We are now working on baby step 3...saving to have 3-6 months of expenses saved in the bank to provide for our family should a rough patch of life be thrown at us, we wouldn't have to go into debt. I do have to say, it is a balancing act to let this new way of life not become something you worship. We have to remember that it is God who provides for our every need! He is the one on the Throne! We are just trying to be smart with our money, tell it where to go, how it will be spent, so that we honor God with it, and one day Give Give Give

After the yard sale last weekend, we have been in recuperation mode this week. Everyone has had runny noses, feeling yucky, low grade fevers, etc. I even had a complete tear-filled breakdown over the grocery list/budget because I was so tired! This weekend, we are looking forward to hunkering down, watching movies, having family time, etc.

Oh, the other BIG news.... all three boys are walking now!! Maverick was first, followed by Crews about 2 weeks later, then Warner (who once made up his mind caught up to Maverick's skill level really fast!). Crews is still deciding what mode of transportation he likes best - walking or monkey crawling. He still does a little of both. All the boys finally got their 1 year molars in, so life is gooooood!

Harper is loving her 2-day preschool. She is learning so much, and dearly loves Miss Judy and Miss Cynthia. She will 'pretend' call them all the time, and ask if they are at the grocery store or at home - lol! I love seeing her imagination develop as she plays with her babies or ponies. She is so fun, and tells me daily, 'Mommy, I love you so much, you are my best fwiend. ' Precious girl!

If you made it this far, thanks for reading! We are doing great!

Hopefully, pics will come soon :-)

10/10/10 = Chris' 30th Birthday!!!

2010-10-10T17:12:00.001-05:00

Happy Birthday to You

(taken from The Knot website)

Happy Birthday to You

Happy Birthday Dear Chris

(the most wonderful hubby and daddy in the world)

Happy Birthday to You

(four generations)

You are so very loved!!!

Love~

Your Five BIGGEST Fans

(Wifey, Harper, Warner, Crews, & Maverick)

Swallowed Up By Life

2010-10-01T22:00:00.000-05:00

I have been swallowed up by life. As I very well should be. Just busyness with four babes under 2. That statement still blows my mind. Here are some things we've been up to:

Harper...mothering the boys, as usual, with both of her hands on their heads. Crews playing the "where's Crews?" game. The other two watching Yo Gabba Gabba (no shame!) :-D

Maverick - This little mister has been walking for a couple of weeks now, and he is getting really good at it! I so love to see him toddle here and there...his pudgy little feet trying to hold up his toddle-y body. I could just eat him up because he is so cute with his curly sandy brown hair and round, chubby little cheeks and big, blue-as-the-ocean eyes.

look at those curls! yumm!! I will let you in on a little secret. The sweetest kissy spot is found right there on that little neck roll. It is disappearing daily as these sweet babies become little boys right before my eyes!

This little cutie has also discovered that he can climb onto the couch, from there, climb onto the back of the couch, and climb up onto the bar. Mommy DOESN'T think it is so cute when he does this. Two words when I first saw this: heart-attack.

Crews - Crewsie Bug (as he is known around here - I wonder if he will ever know his name is just Crews) is a funny, smart little boy! Oh he loves his Mama so very much. M & W come give me snuggles when they *want* to, but Crews would snuggle with me all the live long day if I could. He has severe separation anxiety if I leave him...sometimes even if I just leave the room. The other day I went to Bible study at a friend's home. I take all of the boys with me & a precious lady watches the boys in a playroom upstairs. Well, when I arrived, I took Crews inside and left the other two out in the car while I got him set up. I left him in the arms of my friend, Kellye, and when I had returned with the other two, Crews had worked himself up so bad that he had barfed all over the floor. Since I wasn't sure if it was a bug or just a cry-so-hard-u-throw-up deal, we said hello and goodbye in about 5 mintues. It ended up being just a cry-so-hard-you-throw-up deal (praise the LORD! I dread the day the stomach enters our home). Another little tid-bit about Crews is that he has been fooling us! He will take a few steps here & there, but knows he wants to be carried everywhere! The other day Bekah was here and she said Crews just walked across the living room!!! I told her it had to be Maverick, but I look down at my feet and Maverick was right there with me!! Lol! I have yet to see Crews do this, but I totally wouldn't put it past him...clever little guy! Here is Crews doing his new kissy/fishy face - so cute!

Warner - Has been so funny lately. He is constantly babbling away... no words, just lots and lots of babble. (all of them babble- it just seems that he is the constant one!) It made me worry a little bit b/c none of the boys have been talking & Harper was already saying about 10 words at her 1st b-day. (once again the difference between girls and boys is just crazy!) But, I spoke with the doctor and he said no big deal...as long as they were saying/signing 4 words by 18 months they would be right on track. He also said it is not uncommon for there to be a delay with multiples because they create their own language. Awesome...hope I can learn it! :-) Anyway, W is always babbling away or just yelling...we say he will be a preacher, politician, or singer b/c he HAS to be heard - LOL! He definitely has his opinion about things. He shows no interest of walking on his own. He will walk when pushing a toy, but he will not try to take any steps between two people, nor will he walk if you hold his hands. He is a stubborn little thang, but is such a cutie patootie.

Seriously, look at that hair! It is styled so lovely with peas or apples or something. I love how all my kiddos have curls. My hair is stick straight. The only curly headed person I can think of is Chris' mom, Jo...so THANKS Jo Jo!!! :-)

Harper - This big sister has been cracking us up lately! One funny little girl! She has been attending a Mother's Day Out program at our church and is absolutely loving it! She is learning so much and her teachers say she is a very good helper. I am very proud of her as she is the youngest in the class, but is completely holding her own! She pottys well, naps, is kind to her friends, and is a helper! I think she enjoys being out of the house for a little bit, too. So, a few funny stories about Harper:

#1- I love that she has started becoming quizzical. The infamous 'why' questions are beginning! Sometimes they drive me nuts, but I also love that her mind is trying to figure things out. I was putting her to bed the other night, and we were saying our prayers. Mid-prayer she asks me, "Mommy, I want to see Jesus." I tried to explain to her that we can't see Jesus with our eyes. He lives in Heaven, but one day He can live in her heart if she asks Him to. She said, ' but I want to seeeeeeee him.' I replied, 'well, we can't see him with our eyes.' This went back and forth for a little bit until she said, ' But, I really want to see his hair.' LOL! She must have seen a picture of Jesus & how he has long hair. Oh she cracks me up!

#2- So, Harps has been doing fantastic potty training! Staying dry all night & day! I'm so proud of her. She is finally not asking for M&M's anymore - maybe once a week. Anyway, the other night she announced she needed to go potty. I told her she could go by herself. So off she went. The next thing I know she is crying/yelling at the top of her lungs. I am thinking she has seen a bug or she has fallen into the potty. Well, I walk in there and she is standing by the potty with her panties and shorts around her ankles. I asked her what was wrong. She told me she tried to wee-wee like Daddy and it didn't work. Sure enough, I had missed the giant puddle she was standing in!!! (On the off chance you are wondering why she watches Chris go to the bathroom - she doesn't/hasn't in a very very looooooong time! She must have remembered from a while ago.) Poor thing will *really* want to stand up to go potty once her brothers start potty training!!

Also, that reminds me, I recorded on twitter the other day that for the first time in 14 months we ran out of diapers! Our church family has been so amazing to us!! In fact, we didn't even run out because our sweet Jean (who comes to watch the boys for me on Thursday) came to our rescue with diapers in tow...and she wouldn't even let me pay for them! God has truly provided, and we are so thankful. I also roughly estimated that the boys (not including Harper) have used more than 9,000 diapers in 14 months! Crazy!

And one more pic of the boys eating at the BIG table. Still haven't made the complete switch over, but it's fun every now and then. I cant wait for the day where we all sit down to dinner as a big family & all the seast are filled at the table!

That's it for now. I finally unloaded all the pics from my camera, so I have a ton of things to blog about. I just need to find the time to do it! Can anyone spare a few hours?! ;-)

Night night~
ML

V-I-C-T-O-R-Y

2010-09-09T07:01:00.001-05:00

...that's our pooping battle cry!!!

(FYI: A very long post that is filled with lots of poop talk...don't say I didn't warn ya! Read the first paragraph if you want a quick summary... continue to read added details if you want the looong version.)

To sum up the day(Wednesday, August 25)... Harper pooped in the potty around 7:55pm tonight. Yes, I documented the time because that is how much it meant to me. And this poop was initiated on her own. After a very loooooong day of her rebelling to the idea of pooping on the potty, she finally gave in without a fuss. Well, maybe I should revise that and say, after rebelling to MY idea of pooping on the potty. Maybe she didn't need to go earlier & I was trying to hard to make her. Once I left her alone...success!!

And, here is the much longer version for my records when I need to potty train the boys. Let's back up a bit. I am almost certain my memory will shut this day out. So, here's the potty 411 on Harper. Since Harper was 18 months old or so I have had her sit on the potty before bath time. She was always very interested when I would go potty, so I would let her try. She would be so proud when she would tee-tee! I never made it a big deal, though. Just let her try here and there.

I bought her princess and Minnie Mouse underwear right before her 2nd birthday. Every now and then I would pull it out and tell her when she was a big girl and wanted to go weewee and poopoo on the potty, she could wear these. She would smile and say okay. I may have let her try them on once or twice, but I told her to tell me when she was ready. Off they would go and we would put a diaper back on her bummie.

I kind of started freaking out, feeling pressure that i should train her back after she turned 2. So many of my friends were training their little ones; however, I would always go back to the fact that we would be going to NC for 2 1/2 weeks and I didn't want to ride on a plane with a newly potty-trained child (and 3 other babies!!). While we were at my mom's house, Harper *loved* how the potties were so much closer to the ground than ours are at home. She could get on and off without a step. She just about 'weewee trained' herself there because the potties were so fun for her. She would just whip her diaper off, go weewee and ask me to put another one on! She also did NOT like being wet & wanted to be changed immediately. I knew that these were very positive signs! I started talking up potty training while we were in NC - telling her when she got back home, she would be able to be a big girl, wear her panties and go on te potty like Mommy and Daddy.

While we were in NC, one of the last nights, Aunt Nancy took her to the potty. Harper said she wanted to talk and asked Nancy to sit down. According to Nancy, they talked about emotions - happiness and sadness -LOL!! And, about how when you are a big girl you poop on the potty. Nancy was telling H that she poops on the potty, and Mommy poops on the potty, and, well, you get the idea. (sorry, Minks, for outing you...I think she had Will convinced bf they were married that she was the one girl on the face of the earth who didn't poop...oh, young love.) Ahem, back to the story... and then, all of a sudden we here, 'SHE POOPED!!!SHE POOPED!!!' coming from the bathroom! Harper was just as surprised as all of us were! It was soooo funny! But it showed her that she could do it!!! She was ready!!!

Once we got home, I had planned to start training on a Thursday - was actually planning on starting tomorrow, August 26 , so Chris would be home and we could watch her like a hawk. Well, last Thursday she woke up and told me, "Mommy, I'm ready to wear those panties." I had pulled some out and laid them on her changing table the night before to put something away. I forgot to put those back! So, yay! I told her she needed to keep them dry. She did great. I just let her lead me when she was wet. I figured she would tell me if she needed to go, or if her panties were wet. I didn't ask her at all if she needed to go potty. She stayed dry & went potty a couple of times before naptime. I told her we would put a pull-up on for naptime...to which she said no to. She stayed dry through naptime. She stayed dry through the afternoon. At bedtime she wanted to wear panties. I triple-sheeted her bed (stacked fitted sheet/ then ultimate crib sheet - USC (waterproof)/sheet/UCS/Sheet/UCS/Sheet) so we could have fast middle of the night bed changes. To our surprise, she stayed dried!!!

She did have an accident the next night & totally freaked out. But she has stayed dry since then!!! I do make her wear a pull-up at night b/c I have been sick & need sleep, but we will soon tackle that!

Poop has been a bit of an issue. I ended up calling two of my friends to share my potty training woes (which are next to none - thankfully!) Both had great ideas of prune juice, sticker books, making sure her feet were flat on an object (which I think was the ticket), etc. It was so nice to have other mommies to talk to about the stress of messy potty training.

So that brings us to today...well, tonight. I was, ironically, up to my elbows in poop (the boys' not hers) when she told me she had to go potty. I told her she had to go by herself b/c I couldn't help her. She went into the bathroom and was in there for a while. Thankfully, she wasn't yelling for me to come sit with her. I think she knew I was at my limit as far as what I could do. The boys were yelling and I was trying to wrangle them into their pjs. After a few minutes she yelled, "MOMMY!!! I did it!!! I poopooed in the potty!!!!!" I jumped up (I think I left a baby half naked, but I was soooo excited!) Sure enough, there was a poop! We both squealed! After getting all cleaned up, she celebrated by having not just one m&m, not just two m&ms, but a little bowl of m&ms!!! I told her she could have so many because she pooped on her own!

It is official! Since August 25, 2010 at 2 1/2 years old (30 months), she has done fantastic! I definitely try to keep her fiber intake up. And, I do have her drink a little prune juice mixed with apple juice each day, but other than that I haven't had to do anything else! She is a pooping machine & poops several times a day now! Very much unlike her diaper pooping. Just the other day, she told me she needed to go potty. I was in the middle of doing something I couldn't leave, so she went by herself. She was in there for a little while, so I guessed she was pooping & would call for me when she was done. Nope! She did poop, but she also wiped, flushed, & washed her hands by herself!! I checked to make sure all was clean - lol! And she did a perfect job!!! Where did my baby go?!? I didn't think the independence would swoop in so fast! Well, it is nice not to have to deal with 4 diapers 5 times a day...now, only 3! :-)

Good job Harper! I'm so proud of you little lovey! Have I ever told you that you are the most perfect sister to three little boys?!?! Well, you are.

Love you, darling
(written on August 25, published on blog Sept. 9th)

Wordless Wednesday: When Mom Isn't Looking

2010-09-08T09:43:00.001-05:00

I know this is supposed to be wordless, but he (don't know what baby) climbed into the sleeve of my robe and was crawling around the living room! Hilarious!

When Mama's Sick

2010-09-07T09:00:00.001-05:00

These pictures just prove life doesn't stop when you are a mom and you are sick.

Hey Mom! Why are you laying down?!?

Nurse Harper

It's okay Mama.

This sun felt soooo good!

After coughing my head off for over a week, I gave in and went to the doctor. Came home with 3 prescriptions. I do know that I am getting better though.

Tea Time with a Toddler

2010-09-05T21:18:00.000-05:00

What do you do when you have lemons? Make lemonade!

I *used to* dread babies waking up from their naps. I know, I know, not exactly "mother of the year" attitude, but there are just so many difficult parts about waking up...grumpiness, sleepies, frustration, hunger, the 'crazy' hour before dinner, survival...okay, I think my point was made.

So, I decided to do something fun so Harper and I would look forward to waking up from naptime. We have started having tea time!! And it is oh so much fun!!

I put on classical music or an instrumental praise cd and we have a tea party.

I have tea (usually peppermint). She has juice and water.

Then we have a fun little snack - one day it was nutella on pita bread with a dollop of whip cream.

Another day it was grapes and peanuts.

Another it was chocolate chip cookies and apples.

I try to make it something fun and something with protein

(so we don't crash from the sugar in 30 minutes).

My favorite part is Harpie's little bracelet that she says she *must* wear during 'tea time dah-ing.' (ps hearing a two year old speak with a teensy Brittish accent is about the most hilariously cute thing you have ever heard!!)

My other favorite part is she doesn't fight naptime anymore because she curls up in her bed and looks at me with her big brown eyes and says, 'Tea time when I wake up?' And I say, 'of course dah-ling.' and then we giggle. And the she goes to sleep. And then, this is what we do...

(not every day, but most week days)

I bought this little piggy cup for Harper when she was about 8 months old. I was not even pregnant with the trio yet. I wonder if it was foreshadowing at all?!?! ;-)

I think we will try to keep this as special mother-daughter time. Maybe I will do popcorn and race cars or Thomas the Train with the boys when they are bigger. Something fun for sure!

***********************************************

Annnd, second of all, how do y'all respond to people's comments? Is it best to respond to you by finding your blog & commenting, or should I respond on my comments? What if you don't have a blog? I want to talk back to you, but don't know how!! For now, I think I am going to use the first part of my blog for my post and the second part for responding. We'll see how that works!

Comment Response:
Anonymous - Thank you so much for your comments! After re-thinking bath night, I will not bathe my children all together by myself any more! It is pure craziness!!

Ashely - what do you do with your kiddos now that they roam? Is it any easier pre-dinner?! Or should I expect to keep pack-n-plays around until my children leave for college. :-)

SweetPsNaPod- O I have wanted to talk to you so many times, and I cannot for the life of me figure out how to 'find' you!!! I think we could have so much to share with each other! :-) I love the Maxwell books - they are so helpful and informative! If you go to their website, they have a template in a word document that you can open up. I then copied & pasted that into an excel template & color coded as I went. It did take me a while (couple of hours spread out), but I love the outcome! And I made several different days b/c we have no two days that look exactly alike! :-)

Tara - yay for Target and Sonic runs!!! We would be two peas in a pod if lived close by! I'm sure we would be doing stuff together all the time!! Next summer for sure!! :-) Love you

Okay, well this will work for now! Feel free to post! Thanks to my friend, Tara, I have leared the secret of posting several posts in one sitting (thank you Picasa - you have rocked my world!) I may not check back until later in the week, but I will eventually respond!

All my love~
Mary Lindsey

Catch Up

2010-09-01T21:25:00.000-05:00

We have had a pretty big two weeks here. Let me sum it up...

Scheduling- I got my two books that I was so excited about from The Maxwells (not John, but Steve & Teri). Homeschooling with A Meek & Quiet Spirit and Managers of Their Homes. WOW! I highly recommend these books! Especially if you are a stay at home mom! Much of the info is geared toward homeschooling, but so much is useful even if you aren't "schooling." They are very intent on creating a schedule for your home. I've always been one to live by a schedule, but this is like schedule on steroids! LOL! Let me see if I can take a snapshot of my schedule...

Everybody who is home has a job/something they are supposed to be doing every hour of the day. Yes it does seem kind of rigid, but it is completely a guide for what we are 'supposed' to be doing during that hour. There are so many wonderful things to a schedule: DVD time (to cut down on TV watching), scheduled time that I am 100% with my kids nothing distracting me, and....What has brought the biggest change to our house is Alone Time. As you know, if you've been reading my blog for sometime, dinner time is CRAZY for us! No matter what I've done I always feel like someone is pulling at me or whining or it's just not pleasant. I'm frazzled when Chris walks in the door. He completely understands, but I am not creating a welcoming environment for him (which is a true desire of my heart). Here is the solution that we have found works for our family: individual play! I separate them out - one is in a pack-n-play in my room, one in his crib, one in the playroom (babyproofed!), and Harper is in her room. They get 1-2 toys or books in their crib/room (except the one in the playroom gets MANY toys to choose from), and complete silence. I rotate what room they are in each day so it's new. They don't have that any other time completely alone during the day. And, guess what?!? My house is *almost* as peaceful at dinner prep time as it is at naptime. I serve dinner with a smile and greet Chris with a kiss! Amazing!!! There are also so many other incredible tips in there! Completely worth the purchase!

~~We Dropped A Nap~~
(Edited to add: I wrote this part during the boys *only 1 1/2 hour nap (they are used to sleep 4 hours during the day)....yeah, our day was terrible after they woke up, so we aren't dropping a nap yet. But I'm leaving this section in here for my sake b/c I know we are in transition to this!)

Well, this isn't a done deal, but I think we are pretty close! They boys were sleeping from 10-11:30 in the morning and then from 2-4. I really needed the 2-4 hour to sleep or to do something that I can't do with babies crawling around and needing me. The last few days they have slept great at the 10am nap & terrible at the 2 nap. So, I figured we would see how they would do today. They melted down around 12:30, so I gave in and put them down at 12:45. I would love to make it to 1, but I'm sure we will work our way there. Hope they take a good loooooong nap today! Harper went down early, too, but I still hear her stirring around up there. It may take a few days to iron out the wrinkles, but I'm looking forward to have a good solid 2 hours back to myself again. :-)
One Less In Diapers
Harper is doing fantastic on potty training! I feel like it is safe to say this b/c I'm almost done with the post on how we potty trained her. I want to remember what i did to refer back to with the boys. However, I'm sure that they will train completely different than her! :-)

Took the Kids to Target Like A Big Girl
I have been wanting to do this for a while, but I would always get so nervous! My biggest fear was getting them in and out of the car. I didn't even care if they had meltdowns in the store... I figured people would pity me & just understand - lol. I was scared of the lack of control/ attention I have when I am focusing on strapping one in & leaving the other 3 unattended. It wasn't nearly as bad as I thought. They were right there with in arms reach & sat like perfect angels.

I really wanted to get out of the hosue today. After the last 2 Wednesdays - one you read about here and the other one last week consisted of begging a child to poop on the potty. I couldn't really handle the thought of another day inside for so long. I figured today would be the day! I got everybody dressed and in the car by 10:15. I felt silly, but I prayed the Lord would go before us and cover our path at Target. Do you know that he provided a parking space RIGHT beside a cart stall AND a baby buggy too waiting in that cart stall!?! I unloaded all 4 babes. (I had given Harper a good pep talk before we went). We strolled in with smiles on our faces and went straight to get popcorn and water to keep Harper entertained. The boys were sooo funny...completely mezmerized by all that was in Target. Nobody really fussed until we stopped to look at hooks to hang on the bathroom wall for their towels - that was not entertaining at all! Other than that little fussy, they were angels! The funniest part was when we drove by all the TVs on the wall. The boys just stopped and stared with their mouths hanging open. It was hilarious! Such boys. Here is a picture of the gang:

Anyway, after we got home life was going great...I felt together, I had run by Sonic on the way home to get lunch (grilled cheese). I popped in Yo Gabba Gabba for the kids to watch while I got everything ready. Everyone ate very well. I changed diapers & then they started melting down. I tried to hold them off until 1, but we only made it until 12:40. So down to sleep they went. I put Harper down early too, but ya know, it just went too smooth. Harper never even went to sleep. She was yelling about 20 minutes into her nap. Then, the boys woke up yelling at 2:15 - only 1 1/2 hours! Sheesh! I was exhausted thinking I couldn't do this again. We still had such a long afternoon. They all played together in the playroom while I started going through toys trying to clean out and sort for about an hour. I fed them dinner around 5 (leftover spaghetti & cut up apples - I have no idea why I'm telling all about the food we've eaten today, but oh well). They were in major need of a bath, so we went upstairs. This is where all He** broke loose! Seriously. They were screaming and crying like people were poking needles in their eyes. Poor guys were just so incredibly exhausted. Warner ended up throwing up because he was crying so hard. I had written this on my facebook wall, and look at all the amazing responses i got in return. I know the Lord strengthened me tonight. I could NOT have done this without Him. I was able to remain calm and to comfort each baby as I could get to him or her.

After baths, I gave them bottles, Harper a snack (ice cream b/c she helped me calm down the boys!), and swept the kitchen. Then, it was off to bed...they've been asleep since 7:30! That means an early morning here, so I'm going off to bed too. Harper has her first day of preschool ("pretty school" as she calls it) tomorrow! She is ridiculously excited about it! Oh, that reminds me, I must go pack her lunch!

Thank you all for the prayers - they truly give me strength!!!

Love & goodnight~
ML

Wordless Wednesday: Bitten by Brother

2010-09-01T07:30:00.001-05:00

Happenings Around Here

2010-08-22T15:42:00.002-05:00

First of all let me say thank you from the bottom of my heart for all of your comments from my previous post! If I haven't gotten a chance to thank you personally, know that I couldn't figure out your contact information or I just haven't made it down the list to send you a thank you. Y'all are so precious and encouraging. I wish I could hug each one of you! *hug*

1. It is a guaranteed fact that if I say I am going to blog about something, I never do. So, never again will I announce what's coming up. Just can't do it, Captain. It squelches my creativity.

2. Harper is potty trained! My plan was to start this upcoming Thursday. Well, when she asked to put her panties on this past Thursday, how could I say no?! I told her she needed to keep Minnie Mouse dry. She said okay and that was that. Nap time came & I told her we were going to put a diaper on. She said she didn't want to. I told her she might wake up wet and that was okay. She didn't. We went straight to the potty & tinkle-tinkled! The rest of the day was great! That night, the same thing happened about wanting to put on a diaper. Nope, didn't want to. She stayed dry all through the night!! Woke up that morning and tinkle-tinkled. Everything went great yesterday, too. She hadn't pooped yet, though. She kept saying her tummy was hurting, and I sensed the 'poop-fairy' was hovering. We had a friend over last night & honestly I think H wanted to hang out more than she wanted to sit in the bathroom. So, I asked her if she wanted to put a diaper on to poop and she said yes. So, I put one on her and no more that 2 minutes later, the job was done. Hey, I'm not going to rush her. I told her I was proud that she knew she needed to poop, but next time lets try the potty. She said okay. (we'll see!!) I know a lot of kids get hung up on going #2 in the potty, so I will let her do it in her time. She actually already has pooped twice on the potty. Once while we were at Mom's house and once here. The common denominator??? Aunt Nancy "The Poop Queen" was here. So, hopefully, Harper will decide she can poop without Aunt Nancy's soothing voice or pretty face watching her. I'll keep you posted. :-)

3. I have been coughing my head off. I look forward to getting over this virus so I can get something done! Coughing takes so much out of you that I have no energy to clean up. I keep the house going & the children fed, but as far as appearance goes, it ain't pretty here. Hoping Monday will bring me some more energy!!!

4. Goals for the rest of August- Labor Day:

* Clean out under my sink

* Clean out linen closet & organize meds

* Organize Harper's craft drawers

* Exercise 3 times a week

* Join Weight Watchers

* Get Harper ready to go to Mother's Day Out -2 days a week (woo-hoo!!!)

5. Before joining Weight Watchers, I'm going to enjoy the Chuy's creamy jalepeno dip & chips that are awaiting me during this peaceful nap time. Thanks Arica for bringing it to us last night -

yum yum!!!!

Hope you all are having a lovely Sunday~

Just So You Know...

2010-08-18T21:10:00.001-05:00

blogs can be deceiving. I never want mine to be one of the deceiving ones. It is so hard for me to pick out what I want to write down from our days. Just like many of you, I choose the good memories or the funny memories to blog about because those are the ones i want to remember. Sometimes I think I want to blog about the tough ones, but then i feel like I'm complaining. Which, if I'm honest, sometimes I want to complain.

I write this because my heart is hurting for a friend who lost her life recently. I went to high school with her and many rumors are flying all around about how she lost her life. I have come to the conclusion that we probably won't know the details this side of heaven. And honestly, once we are in the presence of the Savior the whys won't matter anymore. He will be enough. He is enough. I am pretty sure she is there now - in His presence, and that gives me comfort.

I am writing this post because I hurt to think that my life on this blog hurt my friend's life at all. The enemy so wants to use small ways to cut us down and hurt us...to make us doubt that we are worth nothing. One way I think he does that is by comparison. Blogs lend themselves to that. Most bloggers that I know are moms, and sometimes, i have to say, its hard for me not to compare myself to them, to you. I have to watch my train of thought and look at them as examples to follow, not to cut down on what I am or am not doing.

So, I just want to be real tonight. I have had a stinking hard three days, and it all came unraveling this afternoon. We've been in the re-entry phase of travel. If you have traveled with small children, you know this phase lasts just about as long as your trip did (2 1/2 weeks for us). Also, let me add that it's Wednesday, and Chris won't be home until late due to back to school kickoff. That already starts my day off peachy. I try to stand tall through the day, but i start withering around 4 knowing backup aint coming through the door. Okay, the scene is set.

So, back to the afternoon...Harps has wanted me to hold her ever since we got home from NC. Like not put her down. Ever. She was very sick in NC & I did a lot of holding there, but her brothers are getting much more mobile, not to mention are almost as big as she is, so jealousy is there, too.

After telling her no i couldn't hold her for the millionth time, she wouldn't eat dinner because I was giving my attention to the boys to make sure they were eating dinner. I decided to not fight this battle and take her out of her seat. Why She could eat later...kids eat when their hungry. After the boys ate they were covered head to toe in food, so I declared it bath time. Don't get me wrong, I seem like I used great wisdom here, but I continued to feed the boys while giving Harper the cold shoulder. Really? Why am I acting like I am 14 to my 2 year old?!?

During bath time (which you know I despise), Harper had a complete tantrum like I have never seen in my life. I put her in time out because I was so incredibly frustrated at her asking me if she could have toothpaste for her toothbrush (albeit, in a very whiny voice about 843 times). Did i mention I was in the middle of giving the boys a bath? They were at their peak of craziness and just about to drown each other. Harper seriously was screaming, yelling, flailing, gnashing her teeth, and gagging. I just had to let her have it out right there in the hall way while I took the boys out of the bath and set them in the playroom naked. I diapered the boys while Harper was throwing her fit. She was so worked up that even when I came out to try to be all "super nanny" mommy and talk with her she would have none of it. I decided to do laundry & get the boys their pjs. We did eventually talk & work things out; however, the story doesn't end there...fast forward to about 45 minutes later.

The boys had their bottles, Harper finally ate dinner and she was eating milk & cookies. I was cutting everyone's fingernails & wasn't paying attention. Cutting fingernails is like wrestling a pig...my blood pressure is already high. Harper was whining for me to hold her again because I had a baby in my lap & it wasn't available for her to crawl in - whining has got to be the most irritating sound on the face of the earth. How do you teach a child not to whine?! Anyway, one of the boys pulled Harper's milk off the table (no it was not in a sippy cup - you can't dunk cookies into a sippy cup!) and it spilled all over him (fresh & clean baby!!) and all over the carpet. I was at my breaking point and just SCREAMED AT THE TOP OF MY LUNGS for a good 7 seconds. All of my children froze in fear and then all started crying. Awesome. I felt like scum for not being able to control my emotions & parent like a... eh...uh.... um...grown-up!!! Where is my self control?! Anyway, I had to apologize and ask for my childrens' forgiveness. I put them down to bed upset at me because i seriously am out of stuff to give. I love them, i do, but I am completely exhausted. They are safe in their cribs and bed, and are now sleeping...but not without about 15 minutes of crying. I seriously thought I might go crazy.

On nights like these I do cling to the fact that His Mercies are new every morning - Lamentations 3:22-23. I take that verse to heart and I do NOT stay up late but RUN to the bed as soon as the house is somewhat put back together! (and after I vent to the blog world)

Who knows if anyone will read this...I really don't know if this even portrays what a crazy day it was... Anyway, motherhood is not glamorous. It is hard work. Just thought you should know. Thanks for listening/reading.

Love~
ML

Edited to Add: As I was washing dishes, I started think and wanted to add that I am in no way comparing my life to someone who deals with depression. I had a mild case of postpartum depression after the boys, but nothing severe. I don't even know if my friend was dealing with that, but I just wanted to be real and let others know that sometimes life is hard and its okay. Everyones is as sometime. We have to open up and lean on each other to get through the times.

Look What's Up

2010-08-17T20:23:00.000-05:00

Our Trip with the Trips and Harper

You are the BEST Aunt Nancy!!!

Sneak Peek & Happies

2010-08-17T15:05:00.001-05:00

What a great time in NC we had!

I'm working on a post for the trip but wanted to share this sweet little pic that Aunt Nancy took of us.

I can't wait to see more!!!

(L to R: Maverick, Me, Harper, Crews, Chris, Warner)

I also have decided to keep on blogging. Not every day in a row, but I am going to keep it up. I seriously did not realize how many people read our blog, but after going home & having so many of you tell me how much you love it - I'm going to keep it up!

Also, just thought i would share my happiness... all 4 babies are sleeping right now and its raining outside. I'm snuggled in a blanket on my bed. I just ordered 2 books that I can't wait to get. I've heard rave reviews from a couple of friends, and thought I would pass the titles along:

* Homeschooling With A Meek and Quiet Spirit

* Managers of Their Homes

both are by Steve and Teri Maxwell

We are thinking/praying about homeschooling our children, but we still have a few years to go before official schooling starts. However, as you all know, teaching and instruction start the second that your children are born! I remember the first night Harper was born, Chris and I were doing this:

Trying to *teach* her to sleep!

And, I don't know about you, but teaching isn't always sweet. I want to be sweet and have a gentle and meek spirit, but sometimes I get so frustrated or frazzled that I am anything but meek & gentle! That is when I find myself putting Harper in timeout or giving her a spanking - because i want a quick result. I haven't spent the quality or quantity time instructing her. So, this book is supposed to be a wonderful guide in teaching moms to have a gentle & meek spirit as they instruct their children.

I can't wait to get both books in the mail... I'll let you know how I like them!

Hope you all are having a great end to summer and beginning of the school year. Just the thought makes me want to go buy new pencils and sharpen them!

Love~

Mary Lindsey

68 is my new goal

2010-07-23T16:06:00.000-05:00

Okay, so as many of you have come to realize, I have fall off the 100 days of posting train. I tried with all of my might to stay on, but I must let go. I was talking to Nancy last night, and she said, so, just change your goal. well, duh?!? So, guess what... my new goal is 68! And guess what else... I just reached it - YAY! Let's dance, let's party, let's celebrate!!!!!

This past week has been another busy one. We celebrated the boys party on Friday. Saturday we had a good time with my Mom & JoJo & Grandy just hanging out. Sunday morning Harper woke up with a high fever of 103, which climbed to 104. She was supposed to leave with Mom on Monday morning, but instead we were visiting the Dr. She had her first case of strep. :-( Warner woke up on Monday night barking like a seal. Maverick woke up on Tuesday night with a stuffy nose that could not be helped. I had caught it by Thursday. So, as you can see, we've been dropping like flies over here. Mrs. Debbie came by on Thursday and straighted my house like a little cleaning fairie while I slept a little bit. We are trying to recover before our trip to NC.

I'm going to take a bit of time away from the blog (uh, like I haven't been already). My mind will be whirling with the packing, traveling, and unpacking . Please keep our family in your prayers as we venture out into the world. We will be flying with our little guys, and then staying in 2 different homes (Dads then Moms). Please pray against sickness & restlessness & for health, safe travel, and good sleep!

I'll be back sometime in the near future :-)

Love to all~

Happy Birthday Maverick!!!

2010-07-16T09:56:00.000-05:00

9:55 AM

Birth - 5 lbs 12 oz.

Now - 24 lbs.

Macky. You were supposed to be born 2nd. They tried to get you out, but you were too big & wedged under my ribs. Lovely, huh? So, they took Crews first. You are the perfect baby of our family...our big, tough guy. What a curious little guy you have become! You remind me of your Daddy as you are constant and steady (and a little stubborn). You were strong from birth and have remained that way. You have the best laugh and love to laugh. You, too, are a cuddle bug and like to come up to mom for quick little fixes. You give me giant slobber kisses all time and will persist until you have made contact with my cheek. You are a leader to your brothers and will sometimes get all 3 of you in trouble (the candle wax incident, the escaping out of the living, the pulling a socket protector out of the outlet, etc)...you are just so curious. One of your favorite thing to do is put your face up to the air vent and let it blow cold air in your face - once again making you and us laugh. My prayer for you, sweet one, is that you would live up to your name, too. Maverick means a person who refuses to conform to a particular party or group. I pray that you wouldn't be just a "branded Christian," but that you would live the way Christ lived - very different than the culture in which he lived. I pray that you will truly live a life that exemplifies Him and His love - not just what the church expects you to do. I'm praying that you will be a Maverick for Jesus. Stay curious about life, little man - it is so much more exciting that way!

I love you,

Mommy

Happy Birthday Crews!!!

2010-07-16T09:55:00.003-05:00

9:55 AM

Birth - 5 lbs. 1oz.

Now - around 23 lbs.

{let me add that Crews does not have a picture of a cupcake covered face. He loved his cupcake so much that he gobbled it up so fast I had to take it away so he wouldn't get sick. Then he was mad as a hornet & I could not get a picture of him}

Sweet Crewsie Bug. You've been my cuddle bug, thumb sucker, and fighter this year. Your little heart murmur gave us a little scare at the beginning of your life, but I think it was just because you wanted some alone time with mom. Boy have you become a Mamas' boy! Just tonight I had to ask Daddy to hold you because you were following me around the kitchen like a little puppy crying because you wanted me to hold you. You like to be attached to me, and i do not take it for granted. I even made a baby sling to carry you around in on nights like these. All too soon, you will be running and exploring on your own.

One of my favorite memories of this past year was when you were about 6 weeks old. You had terrible reflux and would barf your bottle up. I was still nursing at the time, and I just scooped you up and brought you into bed with me. I had somebody else feed your brothers, but we had the most special afternoon snuggling and cuddling. And guess what, you didn't have any other problems that day?! You just needed some cuddly time. It is sweet because there are still days when you are fussy and all you need is to be picked up and cuddled by me - with a blankie. I will always treasure that day, and hope that you still have some cuddling left in you!

I pray that you will become a tender warrior. Your name means cross. I hope that you will come to know what Jesus did for you on the cross. Why an *empty* cross is the symbol to eternal life in the future & ABUNDANT life now! You have a soft spot in your heart for your family, and I pray that you will allow the Lord to work in your heart to spill out all of that tenderness on to other people. Your heart doctor told me when you were about 3 months old that your heart just played music when it beat. My mind can't help but wonder what will come of that. In the future, if you can't carry a tune, we will look back at this one day & just laugh at how wrong we were. If that ends up being true, I wouldn't be surprised at all!

I love you,

Mommy

Happy Birthday Warner!!!

2010-07-16T09:54:00.037-05:00

Warner William

9:54 AM

Birth - 5lbs. 7 oz

1 year - around 23 - 24 lbs.

{after eating your first cupcake}

A year ago right at this time I heard your cry and saw your sweet face. Dr. Kang held you up and said "Hey Mama." Last year on this day my heart was split wide open with the love I had for you. You cried. You were the first one I got to meet and spend some time with. Daddy brought you back to me when I was in the recovery area. Your eyes were so wide and bright as you studied my face. I will always treasure that moment in my heart, Warner...meeting you for the very first time. We thought we were going to name you Crews, but I just didn't think Crews fit you. You were the one who held your other brothers in for an amazing 35 weeks! Well, you and God.. mainly God, but you were the gatekeeper & defender of your brothers. Did you know that your name means Defender, sweet boy? I pray that you are a defender of your brothers, your big sister, your mom & dad, your grandparents, but mainly that you would be a defender of God & His Word. I pray that you would write it on your heart & fall deep in love with the Author of those words. He will always be your defender, Warner. Over this last year your little personality has taken off! You have a soft & gentle laugh, but are quite fiesty when you want something and it doesn't happen right then and there. It will be interesting to see if this plays out over time. You also are my loud one. All three of you can make quite a ruckus, but you will just be playing and started saying "aaaaaaahhhhhhh" in the biggest boy voice that you have. It is quite funny. i love you, Warner, and can't wait to see how God molds and shapes you.

Love,

Mommy

It's been a week since I've posted...

2010-07-11T10:28:00.002-05:00

However, it's not like I've been negligent. In my spare time I've been a cleaning out maniac...

~~Harper's Closet~~

~~Garage Organizing Started~~

~~Boys Room~~

~~Paint Living Room~~

~~My Clothes Swapped Out~~ (Well Almost...swapped, not put away)

~~Garage Pantry Shelves Installed~~

~~Magnet Locks installed~~

So, now, little blog, you understand. Any ounce of energy I had left at the end of the day (when I blog) was given to walking up the stairs and falling in bed.

I do have much to update about with some great pictures of the little ones! Here are some where the boys look like they are in jail. Every time I kiss them through the bars (they love that game...me on one side of the gate with them on the other) I tell them that this better be the only time I see their sweet little faces through bars like these.

And here is a funny video from Harper. One day last week, we were sitting on the couch, and she put her tiny hand over my heart and said, "Bless My Heart." I must say "bless your heart" from time to time. I just cracked up laughing when she said it, though. Here is a little video of her saying it to me. Now, when she says it, she adds a little phrase to the end of it... "to the town." I will have to see if I can record her saying that. I think "to the town" came from The Wheels On the Bus ... 'all through the town.' Not completely sure though! Anyway, here's my sweet girlie.

"Bless my heart...to the town"

ML

Dinner & Disaster {61}

2010-07-03T16:07:00.001-05:00

While this was cooking on the stove top

Yummy squash spaghetti

And a tasty, fresh salad

Doesn't this look so yummy? and peaceful?

Well, pictures can lie...

because...

This is what was going on under my feet...

Today we went to Home Depot to get MORE baby locks. They have learned how to get into cabinets & pull off the locks we have on there now. So, we are going to the big dogs...

the magnet locks...

Hope these work & that our little guys won't figure them out... AND that mommy won't lock the magnet key in the cabinet!!

I'll let you know!

Making the Switch

2010-07-02T08:41:00.000-05:00

{Oh what a beautiful morning! The windows are open, the boys have been fed & it feels like fall is in the air (but I'm also happy that its not *quite* here). I'm not finished with summer yet! The break in the heat wave is just delightful.}

********************************************************

We have been working on switching from bottles to sippy cups.

Maverick and Warner (green & yellow cups) are doing great with the switch.

Crews isn't too happy about the new cuppy. As usual, he likes to do things in his own time.

We are down to 2 bottles a day, and I think the boys will do better dropping their night night bottle before their morning bottle.

I guess their morning bottle = a cup of coffee.

They are so grouchy with out it.

I like to think that we are drinking coffee together. :-)

If they take after their father, I will have no one to drink coffee with me when I am old.

So, I will enjoy it now - ha!

And I couldn't resist showing how big our girl is getting! She can flip the light switches all by herself!

Why oh why do they have to grow up?

Hope you are having a lovely July Day!

And I hope my family is having a great time at Lake Gaston!!

I wish we could be there with you...

can't wait until next year.

Love~

Floors and Swimming

2010-07-01T22:40:00.000-05:00

Y'all are so funny! All your comments about my floor. Thanks :-) So, one thing that I have going for me is that we are in a new house. The floors are beautifully shiny! To maintain the shine, I do 3 things.

1. Let the babies eat crumbs. I know it sounds like I treat them like dogs. Not really. Its just that they are so stinkin' fast, it is hard to fish everything out of their mouths! So, I just let them ea and don't stress about it. I watch them like a hawk (most of the time) & have had to sweep their mouths of many many things they shouldn't eat (plastic wrappers, tags, rocks, etc), but a few left over crumbs - no biggie.

2. Sweep. I try to sweep daily, but it doesn't always happen.

3. A hardwood floor cleaner, Bona. I had been cleaning my floors with just a little bit of water & a cloth, but when my mother-in-law got me this and oh my word, it just shined my floors right up! I also use a flat microfiber mop. All I have to do is spritz (I love that word!) on the Bona & then wipe it clean with the mop. I try to do this about 1 time a week.

**********************************************************************************
Harper,

Tonight I took you swimming for the first time. I didn't bring my camera because I thought you would be hanging onto my neck for dear life. However, I was so proud of you because you were a little fishie. You started off being a little scared, but one you got in, you kicked your legs, splashed your arms, and even blew bubbles in the water. You loved spinning around as fast as I could go. I am so proud of you loving the water. I think my favorite part was just being so close to you - face to face - and seeing the magic of experiencing something new through your eyes. It was amazing. I won't ever forget it. Hey, once you get really good at swimming, I will teach you some synchronized swimming moves (I was on a synchronized swim team for a year in college - the Aqua Angels)!! Ha!

Aaaaannnd, I am also so proud of you because you went wee-wee in the potty while we were at the pool! Operation Potty Training here we come... well, not until we get back from NC, but we're headed that way!

I love you so much~
Mommy

Here Chickie Chickie

2010-06-30T21:04:00.000-05:00

I have always wanted chickens. I think it all came from watching Cinderella when I was little. Do you remember how she did her chores in the morning & would sprinkle out corn for the chickens and mice while singing? I wanted that. And now, I sort of have it. However, I sprinkle out Cheerios in the morning (or afternoon or whenever they are fussy & it's not actually a meal time) while ~~singing~~ yawning and my little chickies come-a-crawlin'.

Chicken Feed

Warner

Crews & Warner

Warner & Maverick

Crews, Warner, Macky's Leg

Warner

Maverick

Crews

Crews, Maverick (standing), Warner

Crews & Warner

Crews

Crewsie Bug

Warner

Maverick

Here Chickie Chickie~

Where Did I Go?

2010-06-29T22:04:00.001-05:00

1. Chris has been away at beach camp.

2. My aunt has been here helping me hold down

(and paint) the fort.

Surprise honey!

(He wanted it done.... just didn't want to do it himself)

3. The babies haven't been sleeping well.

They know their Daddy is away!

So, any other extra time that was not consumed with paint was

consumed with sleep.

Chris should be home soon & I can't wait to smother him with kisses!!!

I'm Sorry & Tuckie Song

2010-06-24T23:14:00.003-05:00

I wanted to capture 2 precious stories about Harper tonight.

First one : She was having a hard night with lots of melt downs. (Did you know that a 2-3 year old girl and a 12-15 year old girl have accelerated brain growth during these ages? Hence all the meltdowns & difficulty controlling emotions. Read it in a book & can't remember the name of the book right now. Just gives some insight & understanding as to "why"). Anyway, the brain growth doesn't excuse her behavior. She just has to work a little harder (ahem, I have to work a little harder to train her) in how to get these crazy emotions under control. So, she was having a night where she just couldn't get it together. I finally decided we were going to put her to bed. She was screaming like I was torturing her. I had her sit alone for a bit to calm down. Then, I made her tell Daddy she was sorry for her behavior & then tell me she was sorry. Having her make the choice to say "I'm sorry" instead of just repeating it after me was precious. You could see the wheels turning in her little mind. She kept taking a deep breath like she was going to say it, and then she would look up to the sky, look around, lick her lips, take a deep breath again, and finally, she forces out "I'm ssssssss" "I'm sooorrrrr" deep breath, look around, deep breath, "I'm sorry mommy and daddy for way I acted." And then my heart just melted like butter as I scooped her up and told her I forgave her. I realized I had a glimpse of what our Heavenly Father feels when we truly repent.

************************************************

Second Story: Harper & the boys have been watching a Baby Songs DVD about Animals. One of the songs is about a chickie. It is her favorite. We usually have to watch it about 3 times in a row. If not more. So tonight, I asked her what she wanted me to sing. She very intentely and expressively (with hand motions & all - she completely talks with her hands, rolls them over and over each other when she is very deliberate on getting a point across. So very grown up and stinkin' hilarious) ...so, she told me "Tuckie Song" "Tuckie Song" "Tuckie Song". I kept telling her I had no clue what the Tuckie song was. I called in Chris & he said he thought she was trying to say "Chickie song," but when I asked her if that was it, she said no. I told her I would sing some other songs instead.

After Jesus Loves Me, she sits up and says Tuckie Song.

Then, after the Birdie Song (a song about a bird singing praises to God), she sits up and asks for the Tuckie Song.

After Tell Me Why, she asks for the Tuckie Song.

That's when it hit me.... she wanted me to sing "Sleep KenTUCKY Babe." It is so funny that she remembered what this song was because I don't usually sing it to her. I sing it maybe once a week. This is a song my great-grandmother sang to my grandmother who sang it to my mother who sang it to me who sings it to Harper. It has the most soothing tune, and if I could play it for you I would. As I sang I felt her little body relax. I then was able to pray over her, and put her into bed sound asleep. I can't remember the last time I sang her to sleep, and tears come to my eyes as I wonder if this will be the last time I actually am able to hold her and sing her to sleep. I know I probably will when she is sick, but singing to a healthy child is much much different than singing to a sick one. I treasured tonight with every piece of my heart.

Kentucky Babe

"Tuckie Song"

(as it is now known in our house)

this is a very old song & I've changed the words a bit to nullify any racial innuendos

Skeeters are a hummin' on

the honeysuckle vine

Sleep Kentucky Babe

Sandman is a comin' to

this little babe of mine

Sleep Kentucky Babe

Silver moon is shinin'

from the heavens up above

Bobolink is pinin'

for his little lady love

You is might lucky

babe of ol' kentucky

close your eyes and sleep

fly away

fly away kentucky babe

fly away to rest

Lay your sweet, curly head

on your Mama's chest

Mmm Mmm Mmm Mmm

Close your eyes and dream

Sweet Dreams ~

Mary Lindsey

Father's Day 2010

2010-06-24T08:36:00.000-05:00

We had fun celebrating Chris on Father's Day. He had a lot of meetings that day getting ready for camp, though. Harper made him a sweet card that I've put in our treasure box.

We got to go out that night since JoJo (Chris' mom) was here. We went to Target and Sonic. I asked him what was his favorite part of being a father.

He said for right now it is coming home and having the boys and Harper crawl all over me when I lay on the floor. Hearing them laugh.

Harper's voluntary kisses (not the ones when I ask her to kiss me). Laughing at all the funny comments Harper says. Hearing Harper say I love you so much.

Happy Father's Day, my Love.

You are THE BEST!

Wordless Wednesday: Reading Time

2010-06-23T14:00:00.000-05:00

Nimber Dis?

2010-06-22T22:23:00.002-05:00

This is how Harper says "remember this?" She constantly says it and I love it so much. Anyway, just wanted to see if y'all "nimbered us" since I just kind of fell off the face of the internet. Just had to take a break as we recouped from sickness and surgery. Crews pulled through with flying colors! We are all healthy and getting back into normal life routine. However, in case you forgot..here we are:

Mom & Dad

Harper

Crews

Warner

Maverick

I have enjoyed my blogging break. I'm baaaaaccccckkkk! :-)

~ ML

Teaching & Prayer

2010-06-16T21:34:00.000-05:00

Tonight I was putting Harper to sleep. I always ask her what she wants to sing.

She said, "Gospel Bible Songs" to which I about fell out of my chair laughing.

(It is a DVD that she watches, but I didn't know she knew the name of it.)

So, I asked her what song she wanted to sing to which she said, "like a tree planted by the water" just as serious as can be.

So I sang, "I shall not be, I shall not be moved. I shall not be, I shall not be moved,

just like a tree planted by the water I shall not be moved."

I tried to explain to her that song comes from the Bible, which is God's word.

(side note: another Gospel Bible Songs Favorite is B-I-B-L-E, but she calls it the H-A-R-P-E-R, Harper is my name song. I'm telling you, she is hilarious!) Anyway, back to the explanation of the other song...I told her about the Psalm that says :

Psalm 1:3

He is like a tree planted by streams of water,
       which yields its fruit in season
       and whose leaf does not wither.
       Whatever he does prospers.

To clarify, I asked her, " So, this song is God's Word to us. What is God's word, Harper?"

Her answer: The moon.

Uh, still have some teaching to do.

**********************************************

Would you pray for my little Crewsy bug tomorrow morning? He is going in for surgery to repair a hernia. Not 100% sure they will operate as he has been sick this week. He also had a good ol' case of the hives tonight. Hoping it won't interfere with surgery tomorrow.

Thanks~

Itchy

2010-06-15T14:29:00.000-05:00

Last night I went to sleep at 11.

I woke up at 12.

No baby was crying.

My hands were on fire and itching like crazy.

I put them in cold water with litle relief.

I woke up Chris. Poor guy was out cold, but I couldn't think of what to do.

We decided to google extremely itchy palms/ hands.

And for the first time, google was no help.

It didn't even make me think I was dying .

One statement said that itchy palms = money coming your way.

Uh, thanks, but all I want is to go to sleep.

I coated my hands with hydracortisone cream.

No helpie.

I got on Facebook & posted what was going on hoping someone would help.

A few friends suggested benadryl.

I took some, but was up 3 more hours until 3AM thinking about not scratching.

O the torture.

I finally wrapped my hands in cold wash clothes & the benadryl kicked in.

Chris let me sleep in this morning to 9.

I was so excited when I opened my eyes and realized my hands were not itching.

But wait, my tummy has a little itch.

Now my arm does.

Hmmmm, that's funny.

So does my foot.

Aaaaahhhhhh, my whole body is itching!!!!

Hives were everywhere.

I went to see the doctor & she basically said that the hives were the end of the virus we just got over.

Crews had some too, but we didn't know it at the time ~ we thought his eczema was just acting up.

He is much more strong than I am b/c he really wasn't even that fussy when he had his!

So, now, I am taking some allergy meds and I also have a topical steroid to slather on my itchy spots.

Hope this doesn't last too long!!!

~ML

PS... I hate that all my posts are about sickness & crumminess lately. I guess it is part of the "snapshot" i'm trying to take of my 100 days... when one family member gets sick... it just kind of trickles through the whole family. Hope to be back up to par with cheery posts soon!

I Need A Bath!

2010-06-14T21:49:00.000-05:00

Hey Mom,

I really need a bath!

Yeah, Mom, me too!

Sissy is in the tub.

Poor girl can't get a moment's peace.

I don't like bath days because they are such a task,

but I love the results!

~ML

In Honor of the Wolrd Cup...

2010-06-13T20:35:00.003-05:00

Here is a little clip of the boys playing 'soccer' with Daddy. You also get an *awesome* glimpse of Harper's attitude which is about as awesome as the sound of the 'bee' horns blaring at the World Cup. I now know they are called vuvuzelas (thanks to my brother-in-law, Will).

To all you moms out there... what do you do about your child's whining? It gets on my last nerve. I do not want to have a whiny child, and this takes diligence. I know a lot of it is attention seeking, but still, it is not right. I am going to re-read Shepherding A Child's Heart by Ted Tripp again. I read it when Harper was at the endearing age of 8 months old. Thought I would "prepare." Yeah, that was back when I thought I knew it all and she was so sweet & endearing (she still is... just has her moments -which seem to becoming more & more frequent). So, please pass along your advice...

Also, after a sickness, do you, too have to start at square 1 on re-training with behavior? Or is it just our family?

Here's to a great week!
ML

PS... we are all on the mend. I'm getting in bed RIGHT now, and hope to be asleep by 9:45!

Thank You!

2010-06-12T09:09:00.000-05:00

Thank you all so much for your prayers! Everyone seems to be emerging out of the sickness. Harper's fever finally broke after day 6, Maverick finished his breathing treatments, Warner & Crews still have the crud, but seem to be on the mend - no more fever, AND....everyone slept through the night for the first time last night!!!

But, now I have it. So, I've been lying low the last day, and am hoping to recoop by the time Chris has to go back to work on Monday. Mom has been the BEST help this past week - she kept all 4 by herself one night, gave all 4 a bath, and has been the feeding queen! God really does provide when we need Him to.

Thank you so much for all of your prayers! I will get back on the 100 days today or tomorrow!

Love,

In the Trenches

2010-06-09T21:23:00.000-05:00

No post yesterday, almost no post today.

Everyone is sick and we are doing what we can to keep our heads above water.

Will continue the 100 day post ASAP (this is important to me...but my babies are more important!)

Please pray for all four of them. And for us. Thank you Jesus that mom is here!

Love,
ML