Well, this is the night before my surgery. I am sort of nervous, but not really about the surgery. More about pre- and post- surgery than the actual surgery. There are so many rules I have to follow tomorrow. My surgery isn't until 12, but I can't eat or drink anything past midnigt tonight. That is sort of nervie to me. My how I depend on food!
I also have a cold which is clogging my left nostril. I hope this won't effect the surgery at all. AND I hope the drainage doesn't make me sick afterwards!
Well, to anyone who reads this, please say a prayer for me tonight and tomorrow... 2/27 and 2/28. I trust the Lord. He hears me.
I sought the LORD, and He answered me and delivered me from all my fears. Psalm 34:4
Do not fear, for I am with you; Do not be afraid, for I am your God. I will strengthen you, I will help you. I will hold onto you with my Righteous right hand. Isaiah 41:10
For God has not given us a spirit of fearfulness, but one of power, love, and sound judgement. 2 Timothy 1:7
The LORD is my strength and my song, He has become my salvation. Psalm 118:14
Tuesday, February 27, 2007
Sunday, February 25, 2007
Part 4 - Today
Well, now that you have seen a glimpse of my heart, and all that has gone on, I hope you can also see the Lord's faithfulness to us! God truly want to bless each and every one of us in His own way and in His own time. We get so distracted when we look at other people's lives and compare our life to their life. We see we either come up short in our own eyes, or we want the path that has been paved for them. If we just keep our eyes focused on Jesus, and not on what other people have been blessed with, that is when you are truly able to see the heart of God and what He wants for you.
This past December was a turning point for me. I went home over Christmas looking forward to a time of rest as well as family and Christmas fun! Chris and I had a wonderful time being with my family and celebrating. The last night we were there, I found out a friend of mine was having twins. Just when you think you've got it all figured out on how to be strong, something from out of nowhere comes and takes you out! Well, that night was so hard for me. It has been a dream of mine to have twins (I may not know what I am dreaming of!), but when I found that out I just felt like I was in the bottom of a pit. I was tired of the cycle of wanting to be pregnant and not being pregnant, I felt consumed by it.
My mom gave me one of Beth Moore's books- Get Out of The Pit, and it truly helped me to start seeking Christ not for a blessing but for WHO He is! I needed him to heal my broken soul, and meet the deep desire of my heart. I set out in 2007 seeking him every morning. I laid on the altar before Him asking Him to take my broken heart and make it whole.
Blessed are those who hunger and thirst after Righteousness, for they shall be filled. Matthew 5:6
Fill He did. My life began to change. I had peace flood me once again. I was able to take my focus off the desire to have a baby and place it on Christ.
January 19th, I went for my monthly exam at the Gyno :-( , and He said that in my HSG test, he thinks he sees something that requires further testing. So, I went to a second exam where they did an ultrasound to discover a cyst/polyp that needs to be removed. So, on February 28th, I'm going in to have that taken out via Hysteroscopy.
The Lord is so good! They think that this is all that is stopping us from getting pregnant. I pray and hope that it is! I know so many other women go through a hard time of desiring to have a baby - years and years of trying. I know we will see the hand of the Lord! That is the reason for this site... to see God's hand at work! He is so good.
Thank you Lord for allowing us to see glimpses of where you have been!
I love you!
Mary Lindsey
This past December was a turning point for me. I went home over Christmas looking forward to a time of rest as well as family and Christmas fun! Chris and I had a wonderful time being with my family and celebrating. The last night we were there, I found out a friend of mine was having twins. Just when you think you've got it all figured out on how to be strong, something from out of nowhere comes and takes you out! Well, that night was so hard for me. It has been a dream of mine to have twins (I may not know what I am dreaming of!), but when I found that out I just felt like I was in the bottom of a pit. I was tired of the cycle of wanting to be pregnant and not being pregnant, I felt consumed by it.
My mom gave me one of Beth Moore's books- Get Out of The Pit, and it truly helped me to start seeking Christ not for a blessing but for WHO He is! I needed him to heal my broken soul, and meet the deep desire of my heart. I set out in 2007 seeking him every morning. I laid on the altar before Him asking Him to take my broken heart and make it whole.
Blessed are those who hunger and thirst after Righteousness, for they shall be filled. Matthew 5:6
Fill He did. My life began to change. I had peace flood me once again. I was able to take my focus off the desire to have a baby and place it on Christ.
January 19th, I went for my monthly exam at the Gyno :-( , and He said that in my HSG test, he thinks he sees something that requires further testing. So, I went to a second exam where they did an ultrasound to discover a cyst/polyp that needs to be removed. So, on February 28th, I'm going in to have that taken out via Hysteroscopy.
The Lord is so good! They think that this is all that is stopping us from getting pregnant. I pray and hope that it is! I know so many other women go through a hard time of desiring to have a baby - years and years of trying. I know we will see the hand of the Lord! That is the reason for this site... to see God's hand at work! He is so good.
Thank you Lord for allowing us to see glimpses of where you have been!
I love you!
Mary Lindsey
Part 3 - November 2006
November 4, 2006
Three more months… this is like clock work! ☺ I just went through another tough time when I found out Johnny and Meghan are pregnant with their second. That was a very tough night! A night when I was mad at God, when I doubted trusting Him. But His faithfulness is so much greater than my weaknesses. He sent me encouragement through my Mom and Lori Beth Horton. My life can’t be changed by anything I do, but by truly being content and living my life that God has given me to the fullest.
Well, my life has changed. No, I’m not pregnant, but I am content. I am becoming the best wife that I can be. I am focusing on work and starting to focus on getting control of my weight. I think this is going to be a whole new challenge for me. I look forward to starting it and changing our lives.
Last week I had a test done… a hysterosalpingiogram – or something like that. It came out fine. Much more hope! Trusting. It’s a daily choice. Something that I can get shaky about when I think about the here and now. But, when I think about my Maker, that He knew each day of my life before I was even created, He knows the same for my children. I have no reason to worry.
I am truly trusting God for what lies in the future.
Three more months… this is like clock work! ☺ I just went through another tough time when I found out Johnny and Meghan are pregnant with their second. That was a very tough night! A night when I was mad at God, when I doubted trusting Him. But His faithfulness is so much greater than my weaknesses. He sent me encouragement through my Mom and Lori Beth Horton. My life can’t be changed by anything I do, but by truly being content and living my life that God has given me to the fullest.
Well, my life has changed. No, I’m not pregnant, but I am content. I am becoming the best wife that I can be. I am focusing on work and starting to focus on getting control of my weight. I think this is going to be a whole new challenge for me. I look forward to starting it and changing our lives.
Last week I had a test done… a hysterosalpingiogram – or something like that. It came out fine. Much more hope! Trusting. It’s a daily choice. Something that I can get shaky about when I think about the here and now. But, when I think about my Maker, that He knew each day of my life before I was even created, He knows the same for my children. I have no reason to worry.
I am truly trusting God for what lies in the future.
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